Jack wants to get him tested for better help. Janet says she doesn’t want their son put in a psych ward. In the end Janet wins when Tim smiles serenely and threatens to end Jack’s bloodline with him.
Good parents Janet and Jack Drake put Tim through those child safety courses where they teach kids how to protect themselves in case someone tries to kidnap them.
The issue is that Tim is a feral little gremlin of a child with a very strong understanding of public personas and knows to keep his feralness behind closed doors or where no one can see him. So in front of all the parents and instructors Tim keeps letting himself be too easily shoved into this car because he’s out in public and he’s supposed to be polite.
Jacks not having it. He’s not about to have his son shown up by little Suzy with the blond curly pigtails who screams like a banshee and kicks hard enough to end family lines.
“Tim,” he says pulling his 6/7 year old son to the side. “If you can go the rest of this session without letting them shove you in that car once, I will buy you whatever camera you want.”
“Plus accessories?”
“Anything you want.” Tim smiles in that oh so familiar way that swore chaos upon you and your kin and from where she was sitting Janet sighs, sending a text to their lawyer.
The next round is a free for all. Tim is cussing them out in Russians, then french, then possibly ancient Egyptian? (“who taught him how to cuss like that?” Jack asks while Janet hides turns her head to hide her smile). He’s punching, kicking, and there’s definitely biting involved. Somehow Tim managed to twist his way onto the instructors shoulders and has him in a child sized chokehold.
Needless to say, Tim gets that camera and then some. The Drakes happily pay for the instructors medical bill (just a mild sprain and a dislocated shoulder) and thank them for teaching their son the importance of not being kidnapped.
There’s a standing agreement between Jack and his son. Every time Tim avoids being kidnapped he gets some kind of new camera something. It’s to a point where Tim has a reputation in Gotham among the underworld as unkidnappable (not that it stopped people from trying).
Of course over the years Tim’s parents stuck him in multiple martial arts classes (on Tim’s request. This boy wants those camera’s) so more times than less he knocks out his assailants, takes a selfie with their unconscious bodies, and sends proof of avoidance to his parents alongside a link to whatever equipment he wanted.
This is all well and good until Tim becomes Robin. It shows up…I want to say three times that really stand out. The first time is with Ivy. Tim’s been hit with something that leaves him somewhat disoriented, but he’d trained for this. He’ll be fine. Ain’t no rogue getting him to a secondary location no siree. So he goes full feral mode and manages to knock out Ivy. To which he immediate pulls out his phone, takes a selfie, and sends it to his parents with a link because it’s habit and he might be concussed.
Within 24hrs the Drakes are standing at Bruce’s door with questions and also that new Camera lens Tim requested. Tim is hiding his face in his hands completely embarrassed because he does not remember sending his parents the selfie of him posing in full Robin gear with an unconscious Ivy behind him, but here we are. (The Drakes expect regular injury reports and also hash out a deal for Tim to stay at the manor whenever they have to travel. Also Tim’s grades have to stay up and he’s not allowed out during finals).
The second time is probably with the joker. There’s an Arkham breakout and Joker escapes and does manage to get Tim. The Bats are out in full force looking for him when a message pings in their group chat. It’s a selfie of Tim, looking worse for wear with a somewhat foggy look in his eyes, but theirs a feral smile in his face and a probably unconscious and not dead joker in the background.
“Talk shit get hit.” He’d messaged followed by a ping of his exact coordinates.
The most recent and most memorable happened post time stream shenanigans. Ra’s is a little too obsessed with Tim and Tim is just a little too sleep deprived to play along with the pseudo immortals mind games. When asked Tim will admit to remembering nothing, but the proof is in the family chat.
“Get good.” Followed by a selfie of Tim hugging what was probably a mug of coffee but behind him were at least 4 ninja’s and Ra’s Al Ghul himself slumped unconscious looking like they’d been attacked by a wild animal.
“Also I’m on a boat in the middle of Gotham Harbor can someone come pick me up plsssssss.”
Duke: … sounds real
Tim: Careful, the less you use your power the more likely you are to use it by accident
Duke: Why do you know that
Tim:...
Tim:......
Tim:..
Tim: I know everything.
Reverstober
male witch!Hux and his little bit dead boyfriend
Damian, who has just lost the last member of his family, goes off the deep end and, in a fit of violent rage, goes tumbling through a portal and back in time.
Jason doesn’t know how the scary guy with the gunshot wound became his problem but he’s not heartless enough to leave him to bleed out beside some dumpster in Crime Alley.
i just think this looks cool as fuck and i encourage all of you to read this comic. Its AWESOME. Has got to be my favorite so far
Oh…fuck..
AND SHE’D DO IT AGAIN!
Can I just say that…I LOVE HOW I DID DONNIE 😫😫😫 so shpooky yknow??? Also I’m back to possibly double pages after this one!
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Absolutely. Valid. Truth. Yes.
mcd!aphmau may be an incredibly good person and a massive pacifist with more wisdom than anger but. i think she should be allowed to tell people to eat shit and fuck off. you’d have to push her pretty far to get her to do it but she should still tell people to eat shit and fuck off. i think she’s more annoyed with people than she shows
In my mind, MCD!Aphmau and Zane have a very special unique relationship in that Zane is the only person on earth that Aphmau hates more than anything. Like, this is a woman born from the mercy of Christ. And she fucking hates his guts so bad. He’s done far too much damage to everyone she’s loved for her to ever see him as more than pure evil. She is a woman of redemption and even i think she would see a Zane redemption arc as utterly impossible to ever achieve. She has a “kill on sight” policy that ONLY applies to him and NO ONE ELSE. Her and Zane could go back and forth bickering and telling each other “fuck you” over and over again. Even Shad earns more sympathy and mercy and empathetic understanding from Aphmau than Zane does. Aphmau would sooner befriend The Shadow Lord himself than EVER side with Zane.
And on Zane’s side of things, Aphmau is special because no one has ever thwarted him as much as her. He absolutely underestimated her at the beginning, thinking she’s just some random peasant girl in a shitty old town that no one’s ever heard of. And then she turns out to be his enemy nm. 1. The arch nemesis. I very much picture their dynamic in my head as a constant chess match going on between Zane and Aphmau. Zane is normally the king of chess, he gets everything he wants and the whole world cowers before him, but Aphmau has never cowered before in her life and she is most certainly not going to start now. She doesn’t quit. He can back her into a corner, he can take away her loved ones, he can put her in impossible dilemmas and threaten the lives of everyone she cares about with certain doom, all scenarios that would normally crush the average opponent and get them to cave under their own fear and beg him for mercy. But Aphmau doesn’t. She keeps fucking going and she never stops, she just can’t be held down, no matter what he tries. And in the end, he loses. They end up in the Irene dimension and he loses.
There’s something to be said that the High Priest of the Church of Irene’s worst nemesis is Irene herself. The very woman he’s supposed to worship with utter devotion, but once he actually meets the object of his religious faith, he REFUSES TO. He HATES her. He has met his own God and has decided he’d rather punch her square in the face than pledge himself to her. No one hates Aphmau more than Zane, and no one hates Zane more than Aphmau.
anyway i think she would tell him to fuck off and die all of the time and he’d tell her right back at you bitch
A Sovereign State: "International law defines sovereign states as having a permanent population, defined territory, a government not under another, and the capacity to interact with other sovereign states."
The USA already HAS several that exsist within its boarders? And there was that Gay Island of Australia (no really, look it up.) There is a LONG history of humanity going "well fuck you too then, I'm leaving. But also I refuse to leave. I am METAPHORICALLY leaving." *leaves your country and makes their own*
And??
No, really. Social contracts, my dude. That is WHY you have AN ARMY. For INVADING FORCES.
You ALSO have declared us, your citizens, non-sentient and stripped of us our Constitutional Rights WITHOUT hearings, studies, or any due processes. Not to mention just desecrating the dead like it's NOT a well known religious and moral taboo. AND attacking out dead family members! The list goes on!
Why do we pay you taxes, if YOU are the active threat to us AND you offer us no social services?? You've all but cut Amity off anyway!
.......*Takes our ball and goes home* FUCK IT.
They are literally Limnals. It's a TOWN OF METAS. Can you honestly tell me that they WOULDN'T look at the Ecto-Acts and just think: "Yeeeeeah, how about No. Hard Pass."
You can have your INCREDIBLY stupid and offensive law. In OUR country, that's illegal. "We can't do that?" Yes. We can. We informed you in a Formal Document, which you received, you had the opportunity to STOP us, you did or could not, AND we got Regonized by another government.
It's a Ghost Goverment. We, the city state of Amity, were recognized by like... going on 23 at this point. We have a list. All Ghost Goverments, too. Sucks for you that you don't recognize those, they've decided not to recognize YOURS back until you do.
Aaaw D:> Does the Upset Baby wanna call, Superman? Boo Hoo. Somebody's forgetting the Justice League serves EARTH, not AMERICA. Suck on a lemon and die mad about it. Better not come back as a Ghost though! Your Goverment will declare you a lab specimen!
Now if you'll excuse us, WE have interplanetary trade routes. Because WE can use alien tech from our Ghost Buddies. And the Fenton Anti-Creep Barrier means you can't do SHIT. So *large crowd of teenagers making rude noises at frustrated government officials*
*Justice Leauge taking picture in the background* You're doing great sweeties! Aquaman is? So proud of the younger generation? They really are the future, you guys. Can he come in?
Oh of COURSE, your Majesty! *somehow ONLY Aquaman is able to get past the barrier, much to the impotent fury of the GIW and various officials*
@hdgnj @stealingyourbones
Damian refuses to do battle, he just had pokemon for the heck of it. Danny TRIES to stop his Pokémon from fighting. He fails every time and Damian is absolutely smitten with the other teenager whos actively trying to drag his tinkaton away from a fight.
Dead serious Pokemon AU
Danny and Damien keep running into each other because Danny has a tinkaton and Damien has a corviknight and Danny's tinkaton is on site with it every time Damian has it out of its pokeball
Tim: also you should go help Cassie. Someone’s being stupid and she’s gonna kill ‘em. She doesn’t need that case.
Tim after saying something extremely worrying turns to Dick immediately after
Tim: Please don't put me in a mental hospital
Dick: I'm not gonna lie to you, I consider it sometimes
Lmao Leon just ACCEPTED it!!!!!
I feel like Rise Raph, if he met any alternate versions of his brothers, he would just casually pick them up like he does with his own brothers. Except they wouldn't be used to it like the Rise turtles are, so they'd just start panicking instead
Anyway I found a new brush that I really liked the look of, so I tested it out with some turtle doodles
He does it in front of other people and Clown SCREECHES at the top of his lungs. People assume Brandy is killing him but it’s the other way around.
Something something Branzy's hands being cold because of how often he dies and Clown's being warm and and and they hold hands all the time. Branzy is just constant leeching off of his warmth and he 100% goes to hold Clown's hands with his cold ass fingers and Clown SCREAMS ...I am so normal !!