Polyarchives In S5 Would Be So Funny, It'll Be Like The Anti Christ And His Three Weed Smoking Partners

[RRAU] Dealing with Trauma

Cal may have started off shy, but Obi-wan was pretty sure that was purely based on walking in to find his thesis advisor face down on his desk.

short panel strip for @shortcuts-make-long-delays's cwrb fic 'sourdough: flour, water, and starting over' which, as well as being a hilariously clever and super adorable codywan piece, has this mentorship scene between Cal & Obi-Wan that made me positively melt.

LmO

Damian: Baba, I've brought a new member into the family. His name is Raul The Rat. Would you like to hold him?

Bruce, who's scared out of his skin of rats: yes

Damian: Excellent. Mama?

Talia, who's even MORE scared: yes my precious child of course

Obi-Wan: *hangover drunk but not blackout drunk in an elevator* Hey, did you know I can do a standing split?

Cody: *has tapped that before, has had 15 cups of caff and is vibrating into a new reality* Haven’t seen it but I assumed.

Rex: People ask why I don’t wanna go to the bar with you two.

Anakin: *filming Obi-Wan trying to crawl the wall like an exorcist scene* We’ve been stuck in this elevator since the last gymnastics you did, Obi-Wan, maybe stick to the floor?

Obi-Wan: Okay. Cody get on the floor with me.

Cody: Why??

Obi-Wan: I don’t wanna float away.

Cody: Noah Fence. But if I sit down right now I might implode.

Rex: I’m so embarrassed to know them. I would actually rather die than be rescued from the same elevator with these two.

Anakin: *holds up his saber* I mean, at this point it might be worth Padme paying for the damages-

Obi-Wan: *starting to cry cause Cody won’t cuddle*

Cody: *humming at an alarming volume In overstimulation*

Rex: I don’t even care anymore, get us out of here so I can bleach my brain. Now.

Anakin: On it, boss!

Tim: I need to have plausible deniability so that my team don’t think we’re going supervillain just yet.

Jason, who mentioned having to ‘do some business’ after this mission: ‘just yet’???

Tim, smiling thinly and tilting his head innocently: what?

Tim: We're gonna kill them all!

Tim: Figuratively, don't kill anyone

Tim: in front of me

Violence isnt the answer… unless it is.

Disaster Lineage vs. Their Padawans in the matter of being insulted

Anakin: Ahsoka, pay no attention to them. The worst you can do to them is act like they don't exist.

Ahsoka, disappointed that she can't bite them: Yes, master.

-

Obi-Wan: Anakin, think. This isn't how Jedi behave.

Anakin, reluctantly relinquishing his grasp on his opponent's jugular: Yes, master.

_

Qui-Gon Jinn: Excuse me- do you think you can say that to MY PADAWAN?

Obi-Wan: Master, no.

-

Dooku, handing Qui a knife: Defend your honour.

Qui-Gon, shaking: I don't think this is how Jedi-

Dooku: I want no excuses.

-

Master Yoda, steadily pushing Dooku forward like he has wheels: MAKE HIM BLEED, YOU WLL

Dooku: MASTER NO

Yoda: A WUSS, A JEDI IS NOT

Sifo-Dyas, scrambling forwards: NO!!

When Tim starts working out of San Francisco, he continues doing what he always does. Giving money to those who need it, helping, doing good. Tim is adored, and none of his family knows it. Tim is respected and not by the hero community. Tim is fucking feared and that will always be a point of pride.

The drakes are never in town and the entirety of Gotham minus the Drakes themselves and the Wayne’s are aware of this fact and band together to protect one small stalker child who continues to successfully reroute money from the wealthy and hand out large bills when he’s out doing night photography of the bats.

When Tim becomes Robin they all collectively decide to look the other way in regards to his secret identity.

When he disappears after Bruce gets lost in the time stream, there’s chaos. Grayson cannot figure out why the entire city seems so hostile against a new Robin.

When Tim returns as Red Robin there’s parties in the street but they disguised them as celebrations for the latest Arkham roundup being complete with zero casualties.

Tim always knew he’d come back to Gotham. Even if his family’s love is questionable, he knows the city loves him. He pretends he doesn’t know that they know who he is under the mask, but he can’t help but smile a little brighter when some random civilian looks up and yells out a greeting during his patrol.

He doesn’t hide a joy on his face when that one abuela on the 4th floor flags him down and hands him a basket of freshly baked goods.

A young girl made him a scarf once the winter set in one year Tim wore it every patrol with pride even if it was a little wonky in some places.

Jason’s the first to pick up on it. He mentioned targeting Red Robin one time and half his members threatened to quit on the spot. That’s Gothams collective child. The whole city will square up with you if you hurt him.

Oracles knows because it’s oracle. Stephanie was on the street before Tim was Robin. When Tim was just a Good Samaritan that everyone adored. She’s known the whole time and it’s am inside joke for them.

Idk about how the others find out, but it probably takes a while

Tim: the Bat didn’t write the Geneva Conventions.

Bart: in the future he finds out one of you used that excuse and had them re-written!

YJ throws mustard gas into a room full of baddies and one of them's like " Hey, What the fuck? that's against the geneva convention!" And tim goes "So? Do I look like Geneva? 🖕"

Au where everything is the same except Mk monkey form looks like an exact copy and paste of younger macaque (aka. Long White fur, only thing that differed is the ears and the peach colored mask) (going off that headcannon that macaque had white fur but then once he got revived it turned black btw) and it pisses wukong of to no end. Because like how??? You have brown hair as a human. How the fuck do you have white fur as a monkey?? How do you not look like me at all???? You have my powers???? How come we share nothing else?? Wtf??

It also pisses macaque off too because Mk does NOT know how to take care of his new fur at all. For the longest time everyone thought his fur was grey or like light brown and Mk just has to awkwardly explain that “oh yeah no my fur is white but it gets dirty really easily so I kinda just let it fester all day until I shower”

Macaque having had white fur for centuries and having it just come back thanks to lady bone demons ice thing: “YOU DO WHAT NOW???”

Bro gets so unbelievably offended about it too- he literally drags Mk to the nearest lake when he first hears about this on flower fruit mountain and washes him like his a baby monkey. He takes out a brush from his shadow portals and starts brushing mks hair and everything. Wukong just stares wide eye at the fact that macaque was treating his successor like a little kid and going off on him like “I cannot believe you. Did wukong never teach you proper hygiene or what? In the new age of human technology and you decide to just let your fur suffer? I did this because I didn’t have a better option back then but you- I will teach how to take of your fur like it or not you little shit-“

Wukong is just in shock through most of this process but does start laughing his ass off of once the shock wears out and just a sad soggy Mk getting chewed out by macaque remains

Mei, Baihe, and Redson are all absolutely in love with Mks white hair btw.

Baihe and Mei love to play around with it and the biggest reason as to why Mk keeps his fur fairly long. Baihe loves to braid it and decorate while Mei just want to dye it constantly (and also loves to play with it during cuddles)

And because I love spicynoddles: Red son just thinks mks looks fucking majestic. Especially when he has the really intricate braids with gold decorations because Mei knows how to make her best friend look fabulous and will weaponize it

"Strange," Hux said. "Millie hates other people. She's afraid of them, but that's understandable," he stammered. "You're the first one she came to."

Kylo gently lifted the cat and felt his heart skip a beat. He looked into the cat's eyes - the left one was green and the right gray and that part of his witch essence wich usually just knew things gave him the answer.

"That's because she's... mine. Like..." He looked at Hux differently. "You are both mine."