Ghost Helpline Part 5

Family Discussions

BFF: so does Galadriel show up in the Hobbit

Me: wait for it

(A minute after pressing play Galadriel shows up)

BFF: wwhhhhhaaattttt ?!?!??

Ghost helpline part 15 sibling adventures

Klarion just wanted to cause some mischief, just because he left the Lords of Chaos doesn’t mean he’s no longer a trickster after all. Having Violet and Billy gone for so long had made him restless. So when he heard that there was an Atlantean artifact being shown off in Happy Harbor Museum the same color as his only sisters dual eyes he HAD to have it.

It was supposed to be an easy trip. Teleport in cause some chaos, steal the trinket and teleport out. May be he’d get to throw some sidekicks around, he hadn’t been expecting

Dr. Fate.

God he missed Nelson.

—- —- —-

Violet followed the celery dog and it’s master into the empty building- oh not empty. There were people talking at the bar and ten hidden guards. She sniffed the air, the one in green was bleeding.

“Goddamn it Harleen what did you do? Who is this you can’t just bring in strangers to drug deals!”

“Oh hold your horses Penguin. I’m just looking after the kid until someone comes to get her. What was I supposed to do just leave a meta kid alone in Gotham.” Harley spouted while r the walked to the bar, immediately grabbing a drink and downing it.

“A meta huhhh?”

“Oh no Penguin don’t be getting no ideas there, this kid is in no condition to join a gang.”

“Tch- so girly what’s your power?”

The girl was starting to anger Cobblepot, there was something about her that didn’t seem right. She wasn’t even answering she was just staring at all of them! At him, like he was some sort of freak show!

“Well I’m talking to you!”

The girl clocked her head, opening and closing her mouth a few times. She was getting on Oswald’s nerves, that vacant expression was creepy on a kid.

Oswald hated when people stared.

“Your green friend is bleeding.”

What?

The Penguin followed her gaze, around him and to Riddler. She hadn’t been staring at him at all?

“What? How did you figure that out?” Riddler smiled as Harley read him the riot act.

Cobblepot rolled his eyes at the twos antics, “Maurice! Bring the new fish some food!”

Noise could be heard from the kitchen, huh Violet thought - nine guards then.

“Oh come on Oswald don’t be cruel! Look at her!” Nygma chastised as the chef brought out a platter of dead, fully intact fish.

Instead of the usual shrieking the girl stared at it… “This is for me?”

“It’s in front of you isn’t it. Dig in.”

Violet was hungry, and Harleys phone was still charging. She knew she should eat food from people who weren’t her family but it didn’t seem that this came with any strings attached.

- Harley was horrified, the girl was reaching over to grab a fish. She was holding it in her gloved hands, “Hey kid you don’t gotta -“

She bit straight into it. Since when we’re her teeth sharp like that? She was chewing quickly, slurping on guts and swallowing with out hesitation. Like a train wreck Harley couldn’t look away, even as she took her other hand and pulled another fish apart by the ribs.

Oswald laughed and laughed, this was great. He reached over to take a morsel for himself and the girl flinched. Letting the fish drop onto the counter she covered her mouth with her soaking gloves, “Oh, sorry.”

It was the villains turn to stare.

Surprisingly it was Riddler who got over .. all of that .. first, “Why are you apologizing? We told you to eat and you ate. Good job.” He stared over her head to Oswald and mouthed, “Fix this.”

She was still covering her mouth.

The thing about the Ice Berge Lounge was that it was a place that ran on Villains and freakish clientele, this sense of shame simply would do Oswald thought - not here.

“You can keep eating I -“

“It’s okay I’m not hungry.” She said while eyeing the plate.

“Hey bud we already saw your teeth, and we know you’re a meta so you can keep eating okay? Look even Ossy has sharp teeth!”

“Don’t call me that Harls! - But she’s right do eat comfortably.”

The moved her hands down onto her dirty dress, her teeth looked normal now. “I’m not suppose to … I know it’s … ugly.”

Oswald felt enraged, “Look here no one in this lounge is ever going to give you crap about something like that okay kid? So just eat, we’re going to be deal with work so we won’t even look at you Capeesh?”

The kid looked entirely bewildered, Oswald slowly grabbed a fish for himself and swallowed it whole. The girl started eating again and he called it a win.

- Violet continued to eat as the adults talked. She felt mouths water under her skin, she could still smell blood. If it hadn’t been for the one dressed in green she might have not figured it out. But to be fair none of these villains were acting very villainous at the moment, drug deal aside.

It wouldn’t take that long for Harley’s phone to charge… who was she going to call? She definitely couldn’t call dad or Dandy she thought. She knew how mad and disappointed they’d be. And she wasn’t even sure where Billy was…

Alright that leaves seven brothers left.

—- —- —-

All Dandy had wanted to do was go on a nice drive with his brother to pick up their sister. But nooooo his little brother had to pick a fight with a lord of order and a gaggle of side kicks.

The worst part was that Charles and Klarion were utterly enjoying themselves.

“Awww is the Baby League gonna cry?”

Both of them had located Klarion quickly after entering the town, turning into their ghost selves before entering the museum.

Half of the place was destroyed, the entire town was semi floating and Charles was throwing fireballs like it was the only move he knew. At least it slowed the martian down. It was pure havoc.

Dandy saw a blond pocket the necklace. Uhhh, this is why you don’t send Klarion to do a stealth mission. He squared up against the girl, this necklace better be worth it.

- Charles was having the time of his afterlife! He was fighting real superhero’s! … and Dr.Fate.

Unlike his brothers Charles ghost form, lovingly called Danka, wasn’t … fleshy. Instead of a pallet switch, his black hair became black fire and his body discorporated into sizzling unbreakable bone.

Charles laughed as he spotted his brother buzzing around the young Amazonian. Dandy’s specialty was shrinking, collapsing in on himself until he was nothing more than a ball of light. Often confused for the ghost of a fairy instead of a human.

“I got it! Klarion portal us out now!”

Charles whooped out loud, best day ever.

Dandy looked around their new location and held the urge to scream, “Klarion. Where are we? And where is our car?” Worst day ever.

—- —- —-

Billy knew that beating in Dr. Silvana wasn’t a constructive out lit for his anger. But he couldn’t throw a punch at his “co- workers” so this would have to do.

Billy walked down the streets after leaving the reject pediatrician for the police. He knew Fawcett like the back of his hand, even after getting adopted Vlad could never take him away from here. Not that the old man had tried, Billy was almost convinced his family thought the town was his haunt. He slowed down near a drop for homeless kids and stuck a roll of cash inside, all crumpled ones and fives. Maybe they were right.

He kept on walking, staring up at graphite and half finish murals. He couldn’t shake Batman’s words out of his head.

// The three of them had been taken in by Duke Vlad Plasmius at the end of the war. Violet had been promised asylum and adoption for her contributions in battle.

Klarion demanded asylum from the Court of Chaos that had abandoned him and had thrown him into war like a lamb to slaughter. He refused to leave Violets side.

The gods whispered their apologies to Billy. He shrugged this worked for him, they were a packaged deal now.

The trio explored Phantoms Keep like children and played politics like adults. Billy didn’t trust Vlad yet , he knew what adults were like. There had to be an ulterior motive here.

“Vlad! What’s happening what’s going on?”

Violet looked excited. They had all been worked up and dressed up in their finest, which wasn’t saying much. Vlad smiled back at her, “The royal painter is here dear, we are to be cataloged as part of the Royal Family.”

“Us? But-“

“All three of you are to be my children, so all three of you will be afforded the rights of one.” The man kneeled down, actually knelled! It left Billy bewildered. “I can’t promise things will be perfect, and I can’t promise a fairness in the line of succession or anything like that. But I will fight tooth and nail that you are all given the respect and dignity you deserve. So please please let me try.”

Billy could see Klarion waver, and Violet was already sold on the idea. “Okay dad! Let’s go!”

They meet up with their new siblings and all was well. It was a slow and tedious process but both him and Klarion ended up looking good. The human magician was old and stand off-ish but it didn’t matter. He bowed at the appropriate places and was deceptively polite.

… until Violet stood up for her portrait last.

It was all a blur and the painter almost got shanked.

“I’m sorry my Duke, I just don’t see why I have to paint her. It’s not like she’s in any line of power-“

“She is my daughter.”

“Right. Well I just don’t feel comfortable painting someone … like her.”

“Get. Out.” It was a lot easier to believe Vlad after that.//

Billy looked at the city mural and fiddled with his dads credit card inside his pocket. He thought about taking up painting.

—- —- —-

Jazz and Danny don’t get much time together these days, which was fine really. What was a little time apart when they had eternity.

Jazz smiles as Aragon walks into her territory, time to get to work.

—- —- —-

The werewolf stopped in front of the group heaving in anger, “What to scared to fight your own battles blood sucker?”

“I didn’t do anything wrong! I don’t even know you!”

“Liar! My friend dies and you just happen to be in the same area!!”

“Hold on,” Kaldurs voice harden, “Let’s talk this threw calmly. We are actually here investigating a death, if you could give us any information we can take care of this for you. There is no need for undue violence. If -“

The beast man growled, “His name was John Mark he worked in the building you just came out of. Do whatever you want. We know who’s really to blame.”

“I didn’t-“

“Better watch your back bloodsucker! Gggrrr You can’t hide behind the Atlantian forever.” The werewolf bared his teeth one last time before turning away from them.

- Kaldur was left sharing a confused look with Dick. That man had seem ready to hack them to pieces, they had been expecting a fight at least but instead he had spoken as if Kaldur was nothing but a shield. Maybe -

The girl bowed to Kaldur, “Thank you! Thank you so much! I-“

Nightwing stepped in with his easy going persona, “It’s alright you’re safe now. Do you mind if we ask you some questions? We-“

“I didn’t do it! I swear I just got here! I hardly even spend time in the mortal realm!”

“Wait if you hardly spend time here, then how did you know we were heroes?”

Jacks eyes blinked at them, oh shit. “Your heroes?!?!” Fuck fuck fuck

Dick could see the internal panic, “Hey hey it’s okay, just talk to us you’re not in trouble. Here you’re bleeding.” Dick took out his med kit, it would be an ideal time to get a blood sample.

“Don’t! Don’t touch me! You should never touch a bleeding vampire!”

Jack stepped back, god how dumb was this human?

Kaldur was getting worried, “If you didn’t know we are heroes why did you hide behind me?”

The pink dressed mess stared at him, “Do do you seriously not know????”

More bowing, “The stories of Atlantis king are terrifying, no one would be stupid enough to fight one of his subjects … so I kind of used it to my advantage. Sorry.”

Kaldur felt pride swell in chest, “Right.” Kaldur looked at the vampire, they were cute and clever. If only they were a boy Kaldur might, well it doesn’t matter.

“So what were you doing here?”

“I was collecting some flowers for my fright-mate!” A pink bag opened to show off a collection of flower heads, stems, leaves and ziplocks of soil. “She’s sick so I came, into your haunt without thinking.” The stranger flushed.

“Right well you should be wary, especially in places like Bludhaven and Gotham. Also walking around at night is dangerous for girls in these parts, lot of trafficking rings and stuff.” Nightwing debated tacking on a piece about not wanting to see any murders out of her but that felt unnecessary and perhaps a tad to mean.

A confused look took over their face, “But plenty of Vampires live here? And I’m not a girl?”

Well Dick was embarrassed now, Kaldur was just straight up shocked- the surface world really was different.

“Uhhh I should uhhh go… now… sunrise and all that.” She- uh they stepped away from them slowly.

Kaldur reached out, “Wait! What if we need to contact you again? … for the case!”

“Oh here, call for me if you need me. I owe you one for this whole mess I guess- But just one.”

Kaldur held on to the pink headband as the boy speed off.

“Uhhh great now I owe Tim money.”

—— —- —-

Note

For anyone wondering Teekle, Klarions cat, is at home with Vlad.

I can see Billy not trusting Vlad at first only to completely take advantage later.

Yes Tim is definitely a conspiracy theorist that fully believes Vampires live in Gotham.

Dandy hates humans and the painter being a human magician, only add fuel to the fire.

Ghost helpline

So… I feel like causing some misery…

Who should I infect with Vampire Fog????

Leave me your suggestions !!!

Dear Tumblr : How many plushies is too many?

My little brother (13) loves plushies. At first it was endearing but now he practically has an entire shelf and closet full of them!!!! They are everywhere (multiple rooms including mine, the kitchen and on one occasion the bathroom).

At what point is it okay to get concerned? Because I think I’m already there.

An excerpt of tonight’s date convo

Me: this is my exact problem with MHA like yeah blood is gross and Japan has different sensibilities than us but you can not tell me Toga wouldn’t fucking book it to America and instantly gain a huge following

(we had been talking about vampires)

My datemate: just makes a cult

Me: exactly! Or like discrimination against quirkless people you can’t tell me they’re isn’t like quirkless cities dominating some niche part of the market (like Silicon Valley and all the gays moving to the same places)

DM (datemate): like basketball or or

Me: they make all the icecream

DM: XD all the dairy farmers are quirkless

Me: the cows just fucking smell a quirk and kick them

The heroes end up thinking he’s helping because his family members were heroes and they all died- or just phantom died

Cue drama

Danny phantom gets punted into the DC dimension and goes absolutely mother hen on EVERYONE.

This guy is so worried about them he gangs up with batmans kids to get him to consider therapy, buys Billy Batson snacks and new clothes, gives the Flashes really super high metabolism granola bars that he made himself, brings back the queen family's arrows from where they got left around the city, stuff like that.

He eventually kinda becomes the DC's guardian angel of superheros as they start to realize he's visited and helped all of them (they dont really know how to feel about the fact that he seems to know most of their identities but they can't really do anything about that)

Best part is? He's doing it as fenton. No one knows he's a ghost, they just think he's Some Dude.

I know the writers meant for it to be Damien insulting Tim by saying he’s a girl like misogyny

But also he is literally Talias son so...

Also just imagine Tim retaliating like okay you know what bet!

Tim *wears a dress*

Damian *makes fun of him*

Tim *wears an immodest dress*

Damian: why do I suddenly feel protective?

Tim *in an immodest dress getting HIT ON*

Damian: why do I suddenly want to commit murder !?!?

Also

Damian: this is the one you respect! Him? He’s in a ball gown !

Ra Al Gul : grandson I’ve been alive for centuries I do not fucking care ! Also look at him he just used his high heel to take down two shadows if. Anything this just makes him more impressive!

Damian *screams*

Tim: *is engulfed in a floor-length cape with only his mouth and chin showing*

Damian: 

Same!!! Just everyone thinking this poor funky little human got wrapped up in this nonsense while Danny has the time of his life girlbossing and gaslighting.

Have Sam and Tucker and jazz as different types of lawyers or the IRS lol

The King's Informants

Many would say that the Infinite Realms were at peace, now that the ghosts weren't constantly attacking Amity. And in a way they were, but still had some problems.

The Infinite Realms were chaotic and usually didn't follow any rules, Danny's reign didn't change that. That was because death had its own rules and the Realms did their job, Pariah was just horrible at being a ruler and also horrible at making sure everything was more or less where it should be.

When the Ancients recorded a lost soul (which was more common than it seemed), which was neither a ghost nor had passed "to the afterlife" directly, Danny tended to ask the citizens of Amity Park for help, who were grateful with him for his ex job as hero and used to help him. Even if they weren't living in Amity.

Danny would sometimes communicate with them in their sleep, with some help from Nocturne, and explain what they needed to investigate (Danny felt they were some kind of secret informants, or spies, if he was being honest.)

This time, the Realms were in turmoil as "Jason Todd's" soul was missing (and no, Danny wasn't pouting about losing his friend), his soul hadn't registered in any other death cycles or Resurrection. So the King asked Dash to investigate about it and Dash, now a Policeman from Gotham, taked his job seriously.

The "no one is forgotten" network was made up of Amity citizens willing to investigate missing soul anomalies in other cities. This was mostly the Justice League's fault or to do with them, which was pretty frustrating.

Danny was wondering if he should pay them a visit when he was informed that the missing soul was in the realm of the living. The halfa sighed tiredly, he wasn't going to kill Jason to repair the "cycle of life and death" (because that would be hypocritical) but he had to solve the problems caused by said alteration. Being King was fucking tiring.

Only question left is if this flash is Wally or Barry? cuz you just know Dick or Hal are gonna be reading their fanfic notes and become incredibly invested XD

I am not a Father

This is based off @elvesandlanterns’s report of this post.

When Flash, told Bruce and literally everyone else about the photo, Bruce immediately wanted to see it. Why? Because if he could see it, he might be able to identify who this Freddy character is. If he identifies this Freddy, he could identify Marvel’s civilian counterpart. So, that was just what he did, or rather made Tim do.

Robin!Tim: “Hey, Junior?”

Junior: “Yeah?”

Robin!Tim: “Can I see that photo of Marvel and your dad?”

Junior: “Uh… Why? Also, again, Freddy’s not my dad.”

Robin!Tim: “It’s pretty obvious he is, man.”

Junior: “No, it’s not. You also still haven’t answered why.”

Robin!Tim: “I wanna see it because I’m curious about baby Marvel and baby Freddy.”

Junior: “Neither of them are babies though?”

Robin!Tim: “I’ll give you twenty bucks if I can see the photo.”

Junior: “Deal.” *fishes it out of his pocket dimension and hands it to him before taking the twenty bucks from Tim*

It was just a quick look for whatever reason, right? Thats why Freddy thought nothing of it, especially when offered the twenty. They could have groceries for months with this bill! They might even be able to get a treat for themselves with it. Billy’s birthday was coming up, maybe he could get him a cake? Or some fast food? Or a present? Maybe the Bulletman action figure he saw Billy eyeing in a store window? He wanted to get him something, he knew that.

Anyways, Tim guiltily snapped a couple pictures, feeling bad about going behind his friends back, and then sent them to Bruce a few minutes after handing the photo back to Junior.

Bruce immediately got to work, trying to match a names to the faces. He ended up having to switch to paper files and break into the city hall in Fawcett because neither boy would come up in an online database. That’s how he found Frederick Christopher Freeman and William Joseph Batson. Born in 1932 and 1933 respectively. Both Orphans. Both were likely on the streets after being orphaned. No known death date which suggests they could be alive, though it’s unlikely considering they’d be in their nineties and the asbestos in this town would’ve gotten to them already.

Though, considering that Marvel is still alive and young, this could paint a not so nice picture. Could Fredrick have grown old and died while Marvel had stayed young? Is that why he had the look of horror when he was mentioned? Is Fredrick actually Junior’s father? They certainly do look similar. It would also make sense as to why Cap was raising Junior. If this was his friend’s kid, he probably wouldn’t want him on the streets. But then how does Junior have Marvel’s powers? Can Marvel give powers willy-nilly? So many questions yet no answers.

Thankfully, he came across a news channel clip of Marvel saying that his powers were genetic. Billy made that up on the spot, not that Bruce would know.

Okay? So they are related, but how? Does that mean Junior is Marvel and Fredrick’s child? Lord, was Flash actually right about Fredrick and Marvel dating at some point? Wait, but if Junior is actually their kid, how was he born? Surrogacy? William- it’s strange to call the Captain that- has a sister, but she was pronounced dead. As for Fredrick, he had a brother but that’s it. They could’ve gotten someone random maybe? But then how would the kid look like Fredrick but have the Captain’s powers, was it magic? Can you do that? Can you have a magic pregnancy?? Bruce is falling down the rabbit hole and he can’t stop himself.

Eventually, he just went up to the pair and asked them directly.

Junior and Marvel: *talking*

Batman: “Captain? Could I ask you something?

Marvel: “Of course! What is it?”

Batman: “I…” *looks at Freddy for like three seconds before looking back to Marvel*

Marvel: *smiling*

Batman: “Is Junior yours and Fredrick Freeman’s biological son?”

Bruce has never heard a louder silence in his life. A clueless confusion could slowly be seen crossing Marvel’s face.

Marvel: “Wha-”

Junior: “Yup.” *nods his head*

Marvel: *looks over to him with the same horrified expression*

Batman: “Now, Marvel, there’s no need to look like that.” *reaches up to put and hand on Marvel’s shoulder* “Here at the Justice League we accept members of any race, religion, color, or sexual orientation.”

With that Batman left Billy and Freddy there. Billy’s jaw was already dropped, and as soon as Batman was out of sight, Freddy’s jaw dropped too.

Later…

Billy: “I can’t believe you said that!”

Freddy: “Dude, would you have rather wanted to explain that we’re two kids who got powers and decided to fight crime?”

Billy: “…No.”

Freddy: “That’s what I thought. Now here, take this.” *hands Billy a Bulletman action figure*

Billy: “What?!” *jaw drops* “Freddy where’d you get this?!”

Freddy: “I bought it, duh.”

Billy: “This is awesome!” *hugs the life out of Freddy*

Btw for this to work, somehow no one knows about the time bubble.

They need to imply it was the GIWs fault !!!!

hhd

So we all know of Dan's whole planetary annihilation in the past leading to heroes from the future showing up to stop him, right?

Well I'm gonna take that and tweak it a bit.

Time Traveling Hero goes back in time, sees Dan talking to a ghost informing him that the High Queen has finally allowed him back into the Royal Castle and he says "Can't wait." With a nasty smile.

Dan had lost his temper a few months ago, and mom the twerp had told him he had to go outside and think about what he did. But now, he was finally being let back in. And he had a few ideas on how to mess with him in retaliation for being reverse-grounded.