I Should've Worshipped Her Sooner

It's a dangerous game always asking my parents to buy me protein bars and coke zero, but that way they'll pay for it, which is good because I really need to save atm

So the only safe food I'm buying for myself are energy drinks because my parents don't allow them

My class will go on a one week sailing trip in summer, so we're practicing what we'll cook and stuff, starting tomorrow - and I'm so scared. There's no way I'll eat at school, and even though it's kind of established between my friends and I that I just won't eat, what should I tell my teachers or other class mates if they ask?

I could go to the bathroom for a while once it's eating time, but what other things are there?

Please give some kind of advice guys 🥲

STATS??

Well let's just say I'm not overweight but I'm quite definitely not underweight yet 😭 and so I don't feel comfortable sharing that until I've reached at least one gw sorry

I relapsed into sh again, after having been clean for about 15 days

Usually I manage to go about a month clean before urges get too bad

And I did my arm for the first time (I usually only do my legs)

So yeah

I only quit because I have to take swimming classes at school and they're the absolute worst

loser idiot binges instead of starving

I'll go for the ones on the left

Nah I have all four 😞🙏

realizing that I can ALWAYS lock in, even if I'm 1000 cals deep in a binge I can put the food down and not make it 3000 everything makes a difference in the long run

Soooo these busy days I mentioned are over and I have in fact reached my lowest weight since summer! It's probably not that impressive but I am incredibly happy still. (And yes, I am in fact absolutely drained but I did have fun, I'm just so tired now 🥲)

Now I have this Sunday to get through, then a week of school when restricting will be easy of course, but then I'll have two weeks off due to Eastern....

I guess I'll really have to bury myself in work and exercise then and not give myself the chance to eat anything besides the meals I'll have to eat with my family.

Breakfast I should always be able to skip, dinner too I could say I take to my room to eat there because of school work or something, and then lunch I'll just have to always help preparing so I know exactly what we'll eat and so I can make at least my serving lower in calories.

Maybe I'll also have to resort to the sad Pinterest ana meals with half a cucumber and egg whites, because my parents don't seem to know an awful lot about nutrition, and as long as I eat anything they tend to not raise an eyebrow.

(No hate on these kind of meals, they're really a game changer, but since I tend to do OMAD and a small snack, I just really like to make my meals more colorful and more interesting)

I'll also have more time to exercise, then I know of two days on which I can fast, because we'll be travelling to my Grandma, and for a couple of days only my Dad and I will be home, and I have a feeling that will make not eating/eating low-cal meals even easier.

(Partly because the chance someone is going to be in the kitchen when I want to measure out my food will be lower lol)

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