I Will Inevitably Read This Again So Im Saving It

I will inevitably read this again so im saving it <3

I was asking my fantastic friend @sleepingreader what I should do this friday eve, and was told "I would love to see jaskier but he's a horrible swan". So here it is. I share it because frankly, I find myself hilarious. I'm not sorry. And thank you Ella-la, this made me laugh.

"…. What is going on?" Geralt asks, watching the mayhem happening on the village square.

Hissing and shrieking and mocking laughter made the soundtrack to a big, angry swan chasing a man around what seems to be his own stall of jewery.

"You know how Jaskier is a magpie?" Ciri says with an amused smile, leaning against the doorway to the inn with her hood up, braid carefully tucked out of sight. "Turns out the ring he tried out was cursed, and he is letting the owner know his thoughts about it."

Geralt moves to stand behind her, letting Ciri lean back against him as they watch the scene unfold.

The Jaskier-Swan is hissing in ways he usually credits things with contracts at them, nipping after the fat man, only to get a beak full of cheak silk trousers.

His pale ass is bared to the village square and more people are stopping to watch the spectacle, some not even bothering to hide their mirth behind their hands.

"He had it coming," someone says a bit further away.

"When would be a good time to intervene?" Geralt asks Ciri, enjoying the sound of her giggles and the shrieks of the vendor.

However, he isn't enjoying watching more and more of that pale ass, as his trousers slip lower and lower while trying to get away from the big, feathered beasts.

Ciri pretends to consider it, the panicking crook stumbling over his own feet, trouser slipping dangerously low, and Geralt makes the decision.

"Menace," he tells her, ruffling the top of her head over the hood.

"Hey!" She complains, but lets Geralt step past her and into the square.

The moment the swan notices him, he comes charging, hissing and honking with his wings spread, ranting in a bird way that is very much Jaskier's way of telling Geralt exactly what he needs to do to that man. Throwing a hissyfit has never been more fitting, Geralt thinks to himself with a smirk.

The vendor takes his chance and tries to slink off, but Jaskier whirls on him and with his neck low charges at him again.

Geralt wonders what Jaskier will think when he admits he has no idea to turn him back…