Csquared3210 - Sometimes Original Jokes

the thing about carrying tension in your jaw is that once you've started it's really fucking hard to stop

Fantastic art

vegans make peace with honey

no shut up do it

The appalling travesty that was BBC’s Sherlock has infested the Sherlock Holmes fandom like a malignant tumour so I want you all to know how awesome the OG literary Holmes was:

The literary Sherlock Holmes was an autistic coded character before people knew what autism was.

The literary Sherlock Holmes was an explicitly aromantic character before people had a word for that.

Literary Holmes solved mysteries not merely for the intellectual stimulation but also out of a genuine desire to do good. He cared deeply about every client. HE WAS NOT A HIGH-FUNCTIONING SOCIOPATH! He could definitely be insensitive and blunt but he was not callous or unfeeling.

Literary Sherlock threatened to beat a guy who was being creepy with his own stepdaughter.

Literary Sherlock learned to grow past his misogyny after a woman outsmarted him.

In particular, he was always respectful to Mrs Hudson, never belittling or talking down to her (the otherwise enjoyable Guy Ritchie films screw this up too). In fact, they got along so well that they were actually a very popular ship back in the day.

Literary Holmes would NEVER call Watson an idiot. He was his only friend who he loved and respected, even if he did get frustrated with him sometimes. He didn’t need to belittle others to feel powerful.

Literary Holmes and Watson broke into a corrupt man’s house and witnessed him being murdered by a woman he was blackmailing. They knew exactly who she was but they let her get away because they were chaotic good like that.

Literary Holmes had HUMILITY: something a smug prig like Steven Moffat will never understand. He could be arrogant but he had a sense of humour and was willing to admit when he was wrong. And he was wrong sometimes because he was a flawed human being, not some gross male power fantasy.

Literary Holmes respected the working class and was often disdainful of the rich. In Victorian England!

Literary Holmes indirectly caused the death of a guy who abused (and implicitly molested) his daughters and he didn’t give a single fuck about it.

At the end of the series, Holmes retires to Sussex to keep bees. Beekeepers are awesome.

funniest thing about any scooby doo remake is when they make fred a mean jock when in reality he’s a mom friend

Jocelin Carmes on Instagram

reblog this post to give the person you reblogged from a fruit gummy

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If you’re describing a thing as being the size of another thing and you need to qualify the size of the thing in order to convey the size of the thing, it’s a bad thing to compare the thing to. “It was the size of a small—” no. Find a thing that’s the same size as the thing.

The inverse of not just the joke, but the mode of delivery as well

I have a theory:

​Obscure jokes that get added on and proceed to be lost in the ocean and return very rarely

VS

Quick punchlines that are made to be replayed over and over again