I Was Going To Do A Camp Camp One, But Then I Remembered The Merc Trilogy And I-

Seriously just a bit of pollen could make your cat sick within a matter of minutes. Stay far away from Easter lilies if you have kitties!

@keithharingmural I'm sorry did you just call McDonald's sprite™ vinegar??

Peppers are the spicy of the fire, mint is the spicy of the ice, carbonation is the spicy of the air, and vinegar is the spicy of the water.

ATTENTION TUMBLR!!!

Since I wasn’t able to raise enough money to escape my abusive home and get a new apartment, I’ve had to move back in with my homophobic dad who is legally my guardian through the courts. I am an adult, but he’s had me deemed mentally incapable by a judge, even though this is far from true. He is trying to send me to conversion therapy in the United States, right now it is just threats but I need out before he actually does it. Please help if you can. I need to raise enough for lawyer fees to contest his guardianship (5,000 to start), the move (rent is $1600 altogether because I need first and last months) and food + basic necessities/furniture ($1,000). Altogether, I am trying to raise $7,600. Below is the link to my money pool where you can contribute.

@zerocapitalism @thebibliosphere @lostindaydreams-gemz

Comp of my favourite guns

please add on this is fucking wild

You know what this does.

this is called a punt gun. IT WAS USED TO HUNT ENTIRE FLOCKS OF DUCKS AT A TIME.

what’s that? you wish you didnt need to dispose of the body? WELL WHY DON’T YOU GET A FUCKING NINE BARELLED SHOTGUN YOU’LL BREAK YOUR ARM BUT YOUR VICTIM WILL BE RED MIST.

Give this to your party in the next dnd campaign. It’s called an apache revolver and every single fucking class can specialize in it.

You know how in a cartoon a gun will bend, and it shoots that direction? Well this fuck decided to create a gun like that, designed to shoot around corners. 

This is called a PARASCOPE, gun. LITERALLY DESIGNED SO YOU DON’T POKE YOUR HEAD OUT OF THE TRENCHES.

“this isn’t even a gun?” NO IT IS. IT’S CALLED A POCKETKNIFE PISTOL AND WAS MADE FOR HOME DEFENSE. (on a side note we should still make these and have these be the only guns “for self defense” correct me if im wrong.)

“this is a mace?” 

NO DUDE THIS WAS  CALLED KING HENRYS WALKING STICK, AND WAS OWNED BY HIM. IT HAS THREE SMALL HOLES ON THE MACE THAT SHOOT.

take a wild fucking guess how you fire it. JUST GUESS. 

YES. THE GUN IS FIRED BY FUCKING PUNCHING.

THIS IS A FUCKING RING. IT FITS AROUND YOUR FINGER. AND IT’S A GUN. A SIX SHOT GUN 

“well that’s an odd frame for a gun.”

YOU KNOW WHY? BECAUSE IT WAS DESIGNED TO REPLACE YOUR BICYCLE FRAME. The reason these were made, was because before the automobile, the best way to transport your gun was on bike. SO WHY NOT HAVE YOUR GUN, BE THE BIKE

Yes. THIS IS DESIGNED TO LOOK LIKE LIPSTICK. IT’S AS BIG AS ONE TOO. I DON’T KNOW IF THESE ARE STILL LEGAL, BUT GALS, THIS COULD BE A GREAT THING TO CARRY WITH YOU.

You see this rifle? IT CAN DESTROY TANKS. AND YES, THIS BADASS MANAGED TO PERFECTLY HANDLE IT’S WEIGHT.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?time_continue=11&v=nKDtpbLx-XM

YOU SEE THIS GUN? IT’S CALLED A SMART GUN. THE ONLY WAY TO FIRE IT IS TO HAVE YOUR FINGERPRINT SCANNED, AND TO BE WEARING THE WATCH THAT COMES WITH IT. NOW THERE IS LITERALLY NO EXCUSE FOR KIDS TAKING THEIR PARENTS GUNS.

YEAH, THIS IS A PEN. For when a writers done with your shit.

This is called a vomit gun. and you’re right! this doesn’t fire bullets. INSTEAD, THIS BITCH SHOOTS A LED LIGHT THATS SO BRIGHT, AND DISORIENTING, THAT IT LITERALLY CAUSES YOU TO VOMIT, FALL OVER FROM INTENSE DIZZINESS, AND BLIND THEM. IT ALSO EMITS PULSES TO DISORIENT THEM, AND HAS A VARIETY OF EFFECTS THAT REALLY FUCK YOU UP. (the effectiveness and everything about it is being questioned, but it IS bright enough to blind you.)

this isn’t a special ammo shotgun.

it’s a grenade launcher.

this is exactly what you think it is.

30 barrel revolver. What the fuck can I think of for witty commentary. Just look at it.

HOW THE FUCK AM I SUPPOSED TO END THIS.

the suffering never ends

every writing tip article and their mother: dont ever use adverbs ever!

me, shoveling more adverbs onto the page because i do what i want: just you fucking try and stop me

Here are some scientific facts about blood loss for all you psychopaths writers out there.

SenshiStock’s gallery consists of millions of pictures that are free to use as reference.

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As someone that has grown up surrounded by beaches and done surf life saving, I know how the sea works. Lots of people dont. Every summer multiple tourists die here because they don’t respect the sea, if you’re going to the coast, here’s a thing I saw on Facebook.

consider: adhd immortal people

“what was it like 400 years ago?” fuck if i know. i don’t even remember what it was like last week.