New JayBart Oneshot Posted!

*Continues pressing every button* “WHAT ARE THESE ALIEN CONTROLS. GET OUT OF MY HEAD! EQUATIONS... CONSPIRACY!!!!”

panic really does turn you into a complete fucking moron huh

inaccurate Batfam quotes #12

Damian: Give it back, Todd!

Jason, holding a batarang over his head: What are you gonna do? Stab me?

Damian: Pulls out throwing knife yes.

Jason: wait, what?

Damian: stabs him

Jason: You little B*tch!

Bruce: appears Hey, no swearing.

Jason: Demon just stabbed me!

Bruce: Damian, what did I tell you about stabbing your brothers?

Damian: sighs don't stab your brothers...

ᵂʰᵒ'ˢ ᵗᵒ ˢᵃʸ ᶦᵗ'ˢ ⁿᵒᵗ ᵃˡˡ ᵗʰʳᵉᵉ

reblog if you’re asexual, support asexual people or really really want a crossbow for literally no reason.

inaccurate Batfam quotes #15

Jason: Whatever, accidents happen.

Jason, pointing at Damian: How do you think he got here?

Damian: I will definestrate you, Todd.

Bart and the Batkids

Tim: Bart, you have to stop stealing my siblings.

Bart, leaning on Dick, legs over Jason's lap, getting his nails painted by Steph, getting his hair braided by babs, and showing cute animal pics to Damian: I have no idea what you mean.

inaccurate Batfam quotes #34

Batfam playing Among Us

Dick: Super Sus, he follows people and disappears at random, every time he's imposter he vent camps. He really likes the vents.

Jason: Kills three or more people every round but somehow no one sees him do it. Kill sprees are his favorite.

Tim: Suspicous of everything and everyone, even if he's the imposter. always has crazy assumptions that somehow are right. Only likes to do tasks if he's alone in a room. Has a kill spree rivalry with Jason. (plays with Kon, Bart and Cass most of the time tho)

Damian: Has somehow perfected winning the game by strategising his kills. Always does his evil laugh and is super pouty when Imposters target him first. Has the best behind the scene commentary, along with Babs.

Babs: Always cracking jokes and says "oop" a lot. Somehow is always the one to find the body. Lord have mercy when she's the imposter.

Steph: Very hesitant to kill when she's imposter. Unless she's mad at someone. Then she's ruthless. most likely to kill someone in front of other people on accident.

Cass: Never talks durring discussions. No one ever suspects her. She gets imposter 80% of the time. And she's scarily good at it. Her and Dami have a competition to kills in every game. Dami started it, she doesn't even try to play his game. She's just that good.

Bruce: No idea how the Hell to play. Forgets to mute himself when he's saying stuff like "Oh I'm imposter". Tasks? What tasks? He just follows whoever he thinks he can trust. Most of the time he picks the right person to tail cause they never kill him. Jason targets him first every time.

Reference for all you Bart Lovers out there, he actually has really nice and neat handwriting and he can draw things so well that they look like photos— and this is canon— so in your fanfics, he does not have chicken scratch writing. Thank you for your time.

OMZ I miss Greta so much please give me my girl back

Secret: Wow, Bart! I can’t believe you still look as young as the first day we met! What’s your secret?

Impulse: Actually, I’m a ripple user. Every time I tap into the Speed Force, it charges my body with ripples!

Secret: What?! Really?!

Impulse: (chuckles) Mm-hm.

Secret: (playfully) Mua-hahahaha! In that case, I’m actually a vampire with astral projection powers!

Impulse: (playing along) NANIIIIIIII?!??!?! Is that true, Greta?! Then I’ll have to defeat you with my ripples!

Secret: (turns intangible) WRYYYYYYYYY!!!!!

Impulse: (speed punching) ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA-!

Secret: MUDA MUDA MUDA MUDA MUDA MUDA-!

Wonder Girl: (just walked in) … the fuck?

Happy 2018 bitches!!! (Foreign places always get the good shit)

IM SORRY I SAID BART LOOKED LIKE THE BUFF FAIRY FROM FAIRLY ODD PARENTS. I FORGET OTHER PEOPLE READ TAGS I JUST THOUGHT IT WAS FUNNY I PROMISE LMAO

YO, I THOUGHT IT WAS HILARIOUS AND I READ ALL THE TAGS FROM OTHER POSTS + REPOSTS THAT WAS ONE OF MY FAVES SKAKKAKSJAKKSKSJK PLZZ WHEN I READ THAT I LAUGHT FOR A SOLID TWO MINUTES

NO BETA, WE DIE LIKE ROBINS