I'm Not Visiting You In The Hospital

I can't believe you just called Barbatos a manwhore with your whole chest-

My controversial fandom statement for the day is that Diavolo may be kind, he may be beefy, but he is not a himbo.

I've silently decided that Whb Lucifer cant read from the moment I heard he doesn't have a signature btw

I also decided that most angels also cant read, I just think that, One it would be so fucking funny. Two- it would fit with the whole unhinged heaven subversion If the demons could read but the angels cant.

And Three.

The one that I use to justify myself-

Why would angels need to know how to read anyways? god use to give them all their instructions and if worse gets to worse who's to say he couldn't repeat himself? and they barely had/have free will so when would they have the time? Plus would god even allow them to learn? it seems pointless.

as far as I'm concerned Michel, Gabriel and Raphael and Lucifer are illiterate with a severe case of dyslexia no matter what the text say.

Finally someone speaking the TRUTH!

Moondrop do be kinda fine tho fr

When I say I want Luigi to be "permanently consentually kidnapped" by Bowser I mean I want Bowser to just break into his home one day, pick his ass up and just walk away, and no one in the surrounding area to question it

Cannon, this really happened, I was there- I was the shirt Diavolo's wearing

this is exactly why i get nothing done in life

your friend brett in 2003: “hey guys! ready for a deathmatch round in blood gulch?”

you and your two other friends who found a glowing crystal in the back of your house that gave you a prophetic glimpse into the future where the three of you live successful lives but only if brett dies following a series of finely-connected events that begin with him winning a round of deathmatch on blood gulch: “yeah brett you’re on”

ಠಿ⁠_⁠ಠ

this you?

Hey.

Remember when you called Barbatos your "sinister little coochie nut?"

Well I do. Why'd you do that?

WHAT WOAH I DID THAT??

I sincerely do not remember-

anyway, sorry my lil sinister lil coochie nut

completely unrelated to everything else but I need someone to know

Guys am I cooked? What do you mean 0.01% ???

seeing my hyper fixation in such plain english kinda hurts

i drunkingly made this and sent it to like 30 something furries a year ago, Idk why, forgot about it until just now when I'm going through my email to delete stuff

Just, searched Tumblr for "furry" went to accounts and started sending this to people apparently

yeah and??????