I Know That—objectively—this Is Bullshit, But I Have Chosen To Believe That The Reason The US Hasn't

I know that—objectively—this is bullshit, but I have chosen to believe that the reason the US hasn't formally changed to the metric system is for the poets. When the going gets tough you can still claw your way forward inch by inch, but centimeter by centimeter just doesn't quite carry you. You're in love/excited/nervous/scared and your heart is beating a hundred miles per hour, whoa that sounds fast and dangerous! But a hundred kph? I've been passed by people going faster than that coming out of downtown on capital boulevard. The pound of flesh they take from you is raw and bloody and full of pain, the kilogram of flesh is impersonal and excised in laboratory conditions under strict observation. Liters are okay tho, if only because they sound like meter and a meter is used to measure things, so the measure of a man can be siphoned (as a byproduct of the kilogram) into a bottle with a screw cap lid and stored in a dark cool room until he is found wanting. A gallon would be wasteful, a quart too unserious, and a cup not enough to keep him from withering in the desert sands under 100 degree faeghreignheit sun. ...Okay maybe celsius gets a pass too.

More Posts from Cleverlittlekobold and Others

8 months ago

I also think about how there's the imperative of "if we don't try and try again, that wall will have no chance of it coming down. But if we keep at it, then there is always a possibility, no matter how slight."

Compare to:

I Also Think About How There's The Imperative Of "if We Don't Try And Try Again, That Wall Will Have

We have to keep telling the story. If we don't, there's no chance for a different outcome... And I think humanity always wants to have a chance. This time, at least, our mutual striving is for continued survival... But so too did mutual striving give us this hellscape. In the grand story of humankind, we wrote the story we are now in.

Deus ex machina?

No. We haven't written ourselves into a corner, yet.

tbh I can't stop thinking about how i went into Hadestown being like "this is a tragic love story based on a greek myth I enjoy :)" and I came out the other side covered in blood being like "this is a thesis about how capitalism inevitably leads to both personal and global ruin, and so we are duty bound to resist it even as we lose, again and again and again. no matter how impossible it feels or how many times we fail and hit a wall and fall, we try again"


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5 months ago

affirmations

i am a complex organism brutally engineered by uncaring forces of nature

i am a product of billions of years and trillions of deaths

i am building a machine greater than myself

i am able to make phone calls and appointments

6 months ago
Nearly 14,000 mail ballots in Nevada have signature issues
Las Vegas Sun
Nearly 14,000 Nevada voters must verify their identity with election officials to cure the signature on their mail-in ballots or their votes

Nearly 14,000 mail ballots in Nevada have signature issues

Officials urge residents to use online tool to check if ballot was accepted

The total number of ballots — 13,906 — needing curing include 6,383 from registered nonpartisan or other voters, 4,026 from Democrats and 3,497 from Republicans.

The deadline for voters to cure their ballots is 5 p.m. Nov. 12, officials said. Ballots can be cured here.

The main issue they're having with young voters is that Nevada allows for voter registration through the Department of Motor Vehicles, and the "signatures" are digital (the licensee types it into a form), so their hand-written signatures on their ballots don't match the KEYSTROKES that serve as signatures on their license.

It would be hilarious if it weren't so fucking infuriating.


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5 months ago

oh shit we got december tomorrow…


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7 months ago

U may be fooled by my constant melancholia and generally pathetic state of being but take heart in knowing that i am trying unfathomably hard to live


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6 months ago

okay idk if this is going to make my case any better but I was referring to a terrible awful no good very smutty fanfic of George and Lenny where they referred to Lenny's member as, well, lets justr say........his "throbbing baguette."

"someone should just put me down. sexual style. like what george and lennie had."

-- @cleverlittlekobold 11/10/2024


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6 months ago

Rules exist to be broken; that way, when you break the rule, it's intentional and impactful, as you deliberately chose to breach the containment of typicality.

If you break rules without knowing them, then it's not intentional. It's not a choice you made to rebel and make a point; it's murky.

the "canon isn't real we make our own rules" to "i am begging you people to revisit the source material" pipeline


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8 months ago
Man I Wish Beguilers Were In 5e...

man I wish Beguilers were in 5e...

cleverlittlekobold - humour-ous theatre daemon

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cleverlittlekobold - humour-ous theatre daemon
humour-ous theatre daemon

he/they | 23 | theatremaker, devil's advocate, and amateur know-it-all

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