You encouraged your wife to leave the house dressed like that to meet a man she had found on Tinder. As if mentioning on her profile that she was “married but available” wasn’t an obvious enough sign that she was willing to open her legs, she also decided to wear a dress that came all apart with one pull of the zipper. As you had predicted, she did not come back home that night.
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“Five for five” today, Dear. Five erections as you walked up the driveway.
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