Watching Internet Support Group To Feel Something

When I was 24 I sat in a backstage dressing room in London, buzzing with anticipation. My backup singers and bandmates gathered around me in a scattered circle.Scissors emerged and I watched in the mirror as my locks of long curly hair fell in piles on the floor. There I was in my plaid button down shirt, grinning sheepishly as my tour mates and friends cheered on my haircut. This simple thing that everyone does. But I had a secret. For me. It was more than a change of hairstyle. When I was 24. I decided to completely reinvent myself.

How does a person reinvent herself, you ask? In any way I could think of. Musically, geographically, aesthetically, behaviorally, motivationally. And I did so joyfully. The curiosity I had felt the first murmurs of while making red had amplified into a pulsing heartbeat of restlessness in my bars. The risks I took when I toyed with pop sounds and sensibilities on red? I wanted to push it further. The sense of freedom I felt when traveling to big bustling cities? I wanted to live in one. The voices that had begun to shame me in new ways for dating like a normal young woman? I wanted to silence them.

You see, in the years preceding this, I had become the target of slut shaming, the intensity and relentlessness of which would be criticized and called out if it happened today. The jokes about my amount of boyfriends. The trivialization of my songwriting as if it were a predatory act of a boy crazy psychopath. The media co-signing of this narrative. I had to make it stop because it was starting to really hurt.

It became clear to me that for me there was no such thing as casual dating, or even having a male friend who you platonically hang out with. If I was seen with him, it was assumed I was sleeping with him. And so I swore off hanging out with guys, dating, flirting, or anything that could be weaponized against me by a culture that claimed to believe in liberating women but consistently treated me with the harsh moral codes of the Victorian era.

Being a consummate optimist, I assumed I could fix this if I simply changed my behavior. I swore off dating and decided to focus only on myself, my music, my growth. And my female friendships. If I only hung out with my female friends, people couldn't sensationalize or sexualize that, right? I would learn later on that people could and people would.

But none of that mattered then because I had a plan and I had a demeanor as trusting as a basket of golden retriever puppies. I had the keys to my own apartment in New York and I had new melodies bursting from my imagination. I had Max Martin and Shellback who were happy to help me explore this new sonic landscape I was enamored with. I had a new friend named Jack Antonoff who had made some cool tracks in his apartment. I had the idea that the album would be called 1989. And we would reference big 80's synths and write sky high choruses. I had sublime, inexplicable faith and I ran right toward it, in high heels and a crop top.

There was so much that I didn't know then, and looking back I see what a good thing that was. This time of my life was marked by right kind of naïveté, a hunger for adventure. And a sense of freedom I hadn't tasted before. It turns out that the cocktail of naïveté, hunger for adventure and freedom can lead to some nasty hangovers, metaphorically speaking. Of course everyone had something to say. But they always will. I learned lessons, paid prices, and tried to… don't say it don't say it. I'm sorry, I have to say it. Shake it off.

I’ll always be so incredibly grateful for how you loved and embraced this album. You, who followed my zig zag creative choices and cheered on my risks and experiments. You, who heard the wink and humor in "blank space" and maybe even empathized with the pain behind the satire. You, who saw the seeds of allyship and advocating for equality in "Welcome to New York". You, who knew that maybe a girl who surrounds herself with female friends in adulthood is making up for a lack of them in childhood (not starting a tyrannical hot girl cult). You, who saw that I reinvent myself for a million reasons, and that one of them is to try my very best to entertain you. You, who have had the grace to allow me the freedom to change.

I was born in 1989. Reinvented for the first time in 2014, and a part of me was reclaimed in 2023 with the re-release of this album I love so dearly.

Never in my wildest dreams did I imagine the magic you would sprinkle on my life for so long. This moment is a reflection of the woods we've wandered through and all this love between us still glowing in the darkest dark.

I present to you, with gratitude and wild wonder, my version of 1989.

It’s been waiting for you.

sorry but it is just so fucking funny to me that dan and phil were 18 and 22 years old and being sappy gay losers on the internet in 2009 and now they have a mortgage. and by "so fucking funny" i mean im goign to put my head through a wall

me when taylor

obsessed with this

they hate to see their fave be queer.

I AM ONCE AGAIN ASKING. WHY DOES EVERYONE BLINDLY HATE QUESTION…? FOR NOT MAKING SENSE INSTEAD OF QUESTIONING WHAT EVENT IN TAYLORS LIFE COULD HAVE PROMPTED SUCH A SPECIFICALLY WORDED SONG

I SWEAR TO GOD 50% OF MY POSTS ARE JUST TO BITCH ABOUT THIS

Everyone needs to stop dissing my favorite Midnights track. This song is precious to me and its meaning is SO obvious in the context of Kaylor. It’s basically Kaylor evidence. More clearly than any other song.

I GIVE UP ON SWIFTIES.

their not a challege to drag

guys what if after a week without uploading they come back with a tag???? that no one even tagged them in?????

I think as a gaylor, the song imgonnatogetyouback is INSANELY queer.

"im going to pull you into the closet" she's going to closet her lover. Taylor cant be out so if they want to be lovers, they have to stay in the closet.

"Say you got somebody, I'll say I got someone too" Taylor is talking about bearding, specifically kaylor bearding. karli has her fruity little husband and taylor has her fruity little football player.

"You knew the price going in" Karli knew they'd have to stay a secret to the general public. they couldn't be out.

"Once you fix your face, I'm going in" she's talking to Karli, theres no quotations around it. she is saying to someone, someone isn't saying it to her.

"Push the reset button, we're becoming something new" Her and Karli are starting a relationship again. Karli was at the LA N2 eras tour and was seen backstage going to Taylor, that's where it started again. Karli is in Paris right now. so is Taylor. it's still new. it's still fresh. they're restarting what could've been.

"we broke all the pieces but we still want to play the game" They can't stay away from each other. The relationship fell apart but they're still going to the other.

illicit affairs // Hits Different // All You Had To Do Was Stay // Dancing With Our Hands Tied (all lyric connections)

as a retail worker, I agree

retail workers should get double pay on black friday, and also they should be allowed to yell at one customer an hour

i'm s1 april ludgate with my gay bfs

Regarding the kiss, how planned out do we think it was? Like was it just supposed to be another robbers kiss? Seeing the way Jamie did a double take makes me feel like no one was expecting them to make out. And then George speaking into the mic laughing. I feel like a kiss was planned given we see matty signaling to Ross to come over, but I feel like they got caught up in the moment and making out was not planned. It felt like I was watching a scene in a romcom where they make two people kiss and they end up catching feelings lol.

Oh definitely, it 100% got out of hand. Yes it was premeditated, but no it wasn't meant to be THIS intense. I am willing to bet a lot on that actually 👁️👁️

Also about the whole thing reminding you of a romcom, it's SO TRUE. Like you have to kiss as a dare or a diversion or something but you figure out that, oops, you actually like kissing that person. Dear me. 🫠