Bucky Barnes & Alexei Shostakov in What If...? Season 3 Trailer
publishing companies will be like ~ooh this is a hardcover oooh it's so durable that will be $35~ and then you see the actual book and it's like. "perfect"-bound with endbands glued on crooked and a completely plain paper cover under the dust jacket. my dudes this shit is a mass market paperback with delusions of grandeur
Well, I haven't been looking on Tumblr for months now much less posted anything. A short while after my last post (back in October 2010) I was unexpectedly released by my Master. It was a complete blindside for me. When I had talked to him on Friday things were fine. Monday morning he released me.
I do understand his reasons and they had nothing to do with *me* but with his immediate family situation. Yes, I did know what had been going on with it but he didn't give me any idea that he was going to so abruptly make this decision. So no real warning at all for it for me. And it was while I was at work. By YahooIM.
It's been THIS long (now the beginning of March 2011) for me to really realize just how badly hurt I was and the extent of the affect it has had on me. And the affect it is having on my other relationships.
It completely shattered my self confidence and ability to trust or be secure in a relationship. I've been a neurotic mess for months. I'm lucky enough to have a wonderful husband who has been trying to help me as well as a Dom I was allowed to still play with by my ex-Master who was also a good friend, and has become one of my best friends by this time. They both didn't let me curl up in my bed and completely draw away from everything to do with the lifestyle. I love them both beyond words for everything they've done for me and all their patience with me through the past months.
Now, I'm *finally* in a place with myself that I am starting what is I'm sure will be a long road to rebuild myself and my confidence in myself so that I can be happy again and a less neurotic train wreck. (hey, I'm not perfect! I'm sure I'll still have my bad days.) It's a daunting thing to consider how much work I think I'll be needing to do to get my confidence back, but it will be worth it. For me and for them. We will all be happier. I have absolutely no doubt about that.
So, as part of remaking myself I am going to be taking my Tumblr back for myself as well. I had set it up for myself and it turned into something I did for the ex. I'm sure I'll end up posting things having to do with what I want done to me by my friend who is also now my Dominant as well.
I've gone back and forth over removing my past posts having directly to do with the ex. But (at least for now) have decided not to. They were part of my life at that time so while I might not want to think about it right now, they are a good reminder of the things I am capable of. At least, what I'm capable of when I'm a whole person and not the badly damaged mess I still am right now.
I will get back to the person I was then and be the better for it as well since I am now going to have a better understanding of myself through having to identify and rebuild the damaged parts of myself. I will have a better foundation for my sense of self and confidence.
So while this sucks sweaty dirty donkey balls right now and I'm sure will for some time, I want myself back. I used to generally *like* myself. I don't right now. I don't like the person I've become. So I will fix it. The process will probably be quite unpleasant at times, but I want to like myself again and be happy with who I am.
And I will.
Petition for people to stop asking Sebastian Stan about Bucky and for Sebastian Stan to stop making me cry 2k16
These guys are in my backyard year round!
Skel-A-Mingo & DevilMingo Flamingo Lawn Ornaments
Entrapta: An unstable portal is the only thing that would account for all the anomalies. The portal exists somewhere in our world, and as long as it’s still open, it’s going to keep destabilizing reality, making things disappear faster and faster, until, bam, there’s nothing left!
Entrapta: [loud, delighted cackling]
Entrapta, after an ‘oh right’ pause: (solemn tone) Which is a bad thing.
me: I’ve known Entrapta for a week, but if anything happened to her I would kill everyone in the video media industry and then myself.
Abstract art has been given a new LEASH of life - thanks to these PAWblo Picasso artworks. Clever canines create these masterpieces by being covered in animal-friendly paint and shaking their coats. By being positioned close to the canvas they send a splattering of paint flying across the boards in spectacular fashion. (Caters)
Photography by Incognito Media Production
See more photos of the day and our other slideshows on Yahoo News.
Where are we going and why am I in this handbasket? Free Drinks and Bad Advice.Enticing Propositions, Nebulous Boundaries, Hijinks Ensue. General things that catch my interest, could be anything…Sebastian Stan, Winter Soldier stuff…probably with some porn sprinkled in too..... I'm all over the internet and don't always remember where I got things so if you see a picture or something and I don't have it credited correctly, please just let me know and I'll correct it or if it's yours and you'd like it taken down I will.
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