BILLY JOEL AND WILSON HOW WILL I SURVIVE

I like how Wilson always either looks like a guilty dog who’s just been told off for chewing up slippers or like he just got his rocks off and hasn’t quite recovered yet, no middle ground

this is the closest thing we get to house having religion. and by god, if he isn't devout

The universal truth of House MD is that turtlenecks make you gayer. House acts gayer with one, Thirteen acts gayer with one, Cameron acts gayer with one...it's the universal truth.

starting a collection

if house md were running in 2024 there would be an episode with a patient who identifies as an ‘online content creator’ (cagily) where house agrees to take the case primarily because when he offhandedly refers to her as an onlyfans model both cameron and cuddy get really offended and say it’s a sexist assumption so he doubles down and becomes committed to finding the patient’s onlyfans and proving it. at some point it would be revealed that chase actually is an onlyfans model and started doing it as a stopgap after his dad died and he suddenly got disinherited but he makes so much money off it that now medicine is basically just a hobby. cameron and foreman both disagree with the concept online sex work but it turns out they disagree for different reasons (cameron thinks it’s exploitative and not-feminist, foreman finds it distasteful and thinks people should get ‘real jobs’) and spend most of their scenes together arguing about this while chase gets continually more shifty. they break into the patient’s house and there’s a full ringlight and camera setup which seems to confirm house’s suspicions. while trying to find the patient’s onlyfans house accidentally finds chase’s onlyfans instead and considers publicly embarrassing him about it like he did with wilson’s sex tape but soon realises that most of the staff at the hospital are already subscribed to chase’s onlyfans so makes fun of him for that instead. it then transpires that the reason why the patient is so cagey about being a content creator is that she’s an ASMR artist and all the soap she’s been shaving on camera has irritated her lungs. cuddy is about to make house give her 20 extra hours of clinic duty as recompense but at last minute it’s revealed that the website the patient uses for some of her bonus commissions is, drumroll…onlyfans, because she’s been banned from patreon. how does house know this? wilson is subscribed to her because the soap videos sometimes soothe him to sleep. something by cigarettes after sex plays. roll end credits.

me but asmr

Having a comfort character is wild. What do you mean I’m imagining Wilson from House sitting with me while I watch sponge slime cutting videos

Robert Sean Leonard at the opening party for The Invention of Love (2001) alongside colleagues including director, Jack O’Brien, and castmate, Richard Easton.

Breeding kink wilson !!!!!! Poke a hole in the condom wilson !!!!!!! “ive got a vasectomy” knowing damn well he hasn’t wilson!!!!!!! he wants kids and to see u pregnant soooooo baaaad i need that mmf 😕 ESPECIALLY IF THE READER IS MYCH YOUNGER THAN HIM

-🎏 anon

a new sexy anon we love to see it

yk what...HELL YEAHH

im usually not a big fan of breeding kinks, but it fits wilson sooo well

YES YES YES to the younger woman. he is sooo the type to date women half his age (I have a draft of this that im working on right now)

can we talk about vasectomys for a second. because why is that lowk so hot... like after you have kids, a man getting a vasectomy without you asking him to is so fucking hot.

anon i raise you this, breeding kink "i brought condoms" Wilson x "im taking my birth control" reader. idk if this makes sense to anyone but me. you're trying to baby trap him because he's hot, older, takes care of you, and an ONCOLOGIST (money money money) he's trying to get you pregnant because:

a. he wants kids

b. he wants to see you pregnant, and know that he did that to you.

c. he needs to keep you around forever

however, neither of you know the other one's plan. if you did it would almost ruin the fantasy. you came so close to telling him. it was about a week after you stopped taking your birth control and you guys just had sex. you were saying in bed together afterwards and you started to feel guilty. these thoughts don't last long when you remember why you're doing this. you want him around forever, and there's no better way to do it. his arm wrapping around your waist pulls you from your thoughts. he begins to pepper kisses down your neck.

Wilson never had a moment where he really considered telling you. he's so evil at heart oh my god. like he cared about how it would affect you, but he was already planning on taking care of you forever, so it doesn't matter. he'd always be there for you, and he'd treat you better than anyone else could. (this is not in a cute, caring way. it's possessive, it's mean, it's selfish. but god is it hot...)

this was shockingly fun to think about and I might have to incorporate it into a fic (if I ever have time to write 💔)

thank you for this silly little prompt

(after a pregnancy scare this was so funny to write)

so I'm actually fangirling right now why did my favorite person on tumblr just follow me back I'm gonna explode this is so crazy 🥀

i’m choosing to take this personally