Her Gaiety And Enthusiasm Picked Him Up Whenever He Was Down, And Her Ease With The Social Amenities

Her gaiety and enthusiasm picked him up whenever he was down, and her ease with the social amenities filled the gaps that his own reticence occasioned. Above all, she showered him with affection and support, and he needed that. As the seventh child and the third son, following in the wake of two acknowledged “golden boys” like Joe and John, he had never felt for very long that he belonged anywhere. That was what all his striving for personal excellence was about. But now Ethel was there, always there, telling him that he had nothing to prove to her.

When I Think of Bobby by Warren Rogers

Photo by Jacques Lowe

The thing about it ─ and this was told to me by a member of the family, and I think it was important ─ is that Bobby always had a terrible inferiority complex. He just couldn’t live up to his brothers. And he was caught in the middle there, I don’t think he got as much attention as the other kids. Therefore, he was always shy and always unsure of himself. Ethel was the one that changed him and gave him complete loyalty and ego building and whatever. She devoted her whole life to him. Whatever she did was always for Bobby. So, of all the wives I know, she was the least competitive when it came to her husband. She was 110 percent. She would be the one who would get mad… She read everything, and she used to get mad at people that Bobby wouldn’t even have time to get mad at. And, Bobby, naturally, being in politics, was more sophisticated than Ethel about his enemies. But boy, Ethel never forgot and she was tough… I just felt that she ─ and someone said this, and I think it was a very lovely thing ─ they said that she never could get over the fact that she was married to him. It was the greatest thing that ever happened to her. He was very devoted to her. I remember a couple of times he would whisper to me, “Go over and talk to Ethel; make her happy, cheer her up, or something.” He was always conscious of her. And it was a very, very interesting ─ I would call it a beautiful relationship.

─ Art Buchwald

RFK Oral History Interview