I'm As Alone As You Are

Hands and Masks

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Now drive me far away, away, away

Deftones - Be quiet and drive promo cd

(yall should follow me 🙄)

demolition lobsters

first time i saw this scene, i was so confused. but i realized on my rewatch that it’s likely an allusion to homophobia. we can draw this conclusion from the previous scene’s foreshadowing: hannibal and will are inappropriately drinking together during a therapy session. at the end, hannibal licks his lips and gawks at will. then it transitions.

the cut is intentional bc afterwards, we get a b&w flashback of hannibal’s dehumanizing experience with the rude medical examiner:

andrew caldwell: “any other infections?”

hannibal: “you seem convinced i’m diseased.”

andrew caldwell: “i was asking a broader question. a disease is an infection. an infection isn’t always a disease.”

instead of asking outright andrew says, “you should just tell me now, because i’m going to find out, and it will affect your insurance if you lie.” tho it’s unclear if hannibal disclosed his sexual history or andrew presumed it, it’s boorish. not only is he accusing hannibal of having HIV on the assumption he’s gay (HIV = viral infection if left untreated can develop into AIDS; which can be seen as a disease), but he’s also calling him a scammer (HIV+ ppl pay higher insurance rates). he may also be backhandedly calling homosexuality a “disease.” it’s dually offensive bc as a fellow doctor, hannibal realizes he’s not respected.

this theme is further explored in hannibal/franklyn’s session when he bluntly asks, “do you desire tobias sexually?” it’s revealed hannibal’s sexual interests are ‘broad’ (andrew’s indirect question) and he does desire will sexually. even if the relationship isn’t physical; highlighted by his freakout over will’s missed appt. hannibal’s quandary is: is he in love or does he simply crave friendship? it’s both, but he also desires power. hannibal mirrors andrew’s hostility (subconsciously) bc the exam left him feeling powerless. subsequently, will has also rendered him powerless, bc he now sees himself as the franklyn.

i really wish five hours of sleep was sufficient because going to bed at 2 and waking up at 7 would be heaven but the body keeps score

Hannibal 3x06 - “Dolce”

i must not kill myself . killing myself is the myself killer