Lets Have Phone Sex Over Walkie Talkies

power of the stars

And he drank it all

right person, wrong time

sure, i'll drink the pink swirly potion that released a little heart shaped cloud when you uncorked it. what's the worst that could happen

the “pleasure to have in class” to overly active tumblr user pipeline

Love men who get horny from mundane things. He needs to go through a man’s equivalent of ovulation when he sees you folding laundry. He has to feel like he needs to be sedated because you were humming while making coffee. He should feel like he’s in heat simply because you giggled at something in your phone. It would be borderline offensive if your simple existence did not send him into the world’s most frenzy of All Time actually

those bombs were my drugs when I played botw

missing babe so much right now

you’ve saved me so much weapon durability in botw and i want to u to know u were appreciated

u cut my trees

u kaboom’d my bokos

i love u

Epic AU

Odysseus: How many suitors are there? Servant: 128. Though, twenty of them formed a guard, after Antinous turned out to be a dick. Odysseus: *Thinking* Servant: Ten are away with the prince, the other ten are keeping guard over Penelope. Odysseus: Why? Servant: They're being bodyguards Odysseus: No, why did they come if they're not seeking the Queen's hand? Servant: Oh, they're trying to convince the Prince to marry their daughters. *Meanwhile* Guard #1: *Watching Telemachus with one of his friends* I'm starting to think the Prince might be swinging the other way. Guard #2: That's alright, I've got a son.

i <3 menial tasks. for srs.