When Someone Leaves A Comment On Your Work Saying They Liked A Certain Bit Of The Chapter, And You Can’t

Percy is mesmerized by deep sea creatures and Annabeth is... She's definitely not. Grover is also not. Sally says she's seen them before with a vague look of discomfort on her face. Estelle cries at the darkness and then again at the skin-tight face of a goblin shark. Paul sweats at the idea of going so deep into the dark ocean with only his stepson to protect him from the crushing water pressure.

But Nico likes them. He coos at every creepy face and traces sharp teeth and listens attentively as Percy babbles on and on about the fish and the bugs and the scavengers. He takes him to whale falls and shows him every intricate bit of the flourishing ecosystem. Nico holds sea cucumbers in his palms, and strokes the skin of a properly viewed blobfish, and watches with gentle awe as a blue whale swims above their heads. Percy's eyes cast a glow that his skin faintly matches in the deep dark depths, but Nico's born of shadows and darkness and can see just fine.

Percy gets it - the depths are not for everyone, his docked and land-side family included. They listen when he rambles, but up close and personal is pushing it the levels to which comfort is unavailable. But still.

It's nice to share this with someone.

Stop it! You're giving me ideas!

Imagining being Percy's children and asking your father about this certain man with whom your father cannot stand face to face, is always awkward despite having been acquainted for 10-20 years, doesn't know how to address, referring to him as 'friends' half of the time and 'it's complicated' in the rest. But also, who your father would rush to help and would rush to help your father and by association your family in kind. what a guy.

“In fairness, murder is a lot quicker, though.”

One of the coziest second hand bookshops I’ve visited

THERE'S NO PLACE LIKE HOME - PERCY/NICO AU HIGH SCHOOL - CHAPTER V

Hi, we are back (temporarily). I'm still on my resting days, but I managed to bring you one more chapter. Hope you like it.

Previous chapters: CHAPTER I / CHAPTER II / CHAPTER III / CHAPTER IV

As expected, a new day came. The sun was shining brightly through the blinds, the birds were singing and they were late. Still, what worried Nico was not the fact that it was almost seven o'clock in the morning, but that someone was knocking on the door. And that someone was his sister, Bianca, who would usually be long gone to her first class of the day, but now was standing inside his room, watching them happily.

He was in a nightmare, that had to be the only explanation to justify the scene Nico has found himself in. Percy against his back, hugging him tight with only a sheet hiding their crotch. If Bianca decided to pull back the sheets, she would see it all, the marks on Percy's back and the hickey between Nico’s legs, impossible to miss even from that distance. And contrary to what he thought, Bianca decided to be kind. She waved goodbye with a lopsided smile and closed the door softly, though he could hear the sound of her laughter as she walked away down the hall. And again, he wondered what he was doing. He hadn't even… hadn’t reciprocated Percy the night before. He was the pettiest, most selfish person in the whole world.

Nico would’ve continued his self-flagellation if he hadn't felt the silent laughter against his back.

“Are you laughing at me?” Nico said, turning in Percy's arms. The boy was awake and wearing one of those smiles that infuriated and excited him at the same time.

“You have to admit, it's pretty funny.”

"No, it is not!”

"What's new? It's not the first time someone has caught us sleeping together.”

"Yeah? But it's the first time we're naked!”

“Oh.” Percy says, his smile softening. "It's even better.”

"You--you!"

Nico got up faster than a rocket, he grabbed the first thing he saw and threw it at Percy's head. When he saw it was a pillow, he picked up the object again and smacked Percy over the head with it until his arms began to ache and he was forced to stop, settling where he was, only now realizing to be Percy's lap. What pissed him off the most was the fact that Percy didn't even try to defend himself, laughing, sprawled across the bed like it was the happiest day of his life.

“Percy!”

“Gods! I think I’m dying. Did I go back in time by any chance? I still remember--

"Don’t you dare! How old are you?”

"Ten. Want to play house? I’ll build a fort out of chairs and blankets and we can--

"What got into you today, huh?"

"I'm happy. Don’t you?”

Nico stopped in the middle of another complaint, realizing that he was naked and still sitting on Percy's lap, just like he had a thousand times before, but this time, it meant so much more.

“Of course I am. But you don't have to go back to kindergarten.”

"Why not? It’s more fun than pretending to be a responsible adult.”

"We're not pretending… are we?"

“Nico." That's what Percy said before sitting down and hugging him tightly from the middle of his back. “I can fake many things, what I feel for you is not one of them.”

“I don't understand why now. What has changed?”

"Everything changed. You went away.”

“Per… I didn't know you cared so much, I thought… it was better if you didn't have a shadow following you around the corners.”

“Nico." Now Percy looked like he was in pain. "Who told you that? What made you think like this?”

“Well… it's just… you know… she said those things and I asked myself 'what if it's true?' I thought a little distance would be good.”

"For who? For me or for you?”

It was a good question. He just didn't want to feel so bad every time he saw those people in the school’s hallways, murmuring behind his back, things he didn't even want to know what it was, but deep down already suspected what it could be.

"Answer me.” Then Percy grabbed his face and made him look at him closely. "What were you running from?"

"Does it matter now? What will you do? Go after them and say how horrible they are? What... what's the use of looking back at the past?”

"When did you grow so much?" Percy didn't look happy about it, resigned at best.

“When I had to leave behind the one I loved the most.”

This finally silenced Percy, the boy looking at him so sadly it looked like Percy would burst into tears at any moment.

“I know who did this.” Percy said. “I needed to hear it from you. I didn't want to believe that she would do something like that.”

Nico found himself smiling, though it was a wilted, sad thing. That was the truth, people were mean and some of them would do anything to get what they wanted. The secret was not to be innocent and protect yourself, or try to stay away from their wrath. 

What could you do but try? He hugged Percy tightly and laid his head on Percy's shoulder. Since they were running late, there’s no need to rush things up.

***

When they finally went downstairs with their shower taken and hair combed, breakfast was already on the table; eggs, bacon, coffee, and juice. Something simple, but that they rarely had time to do. Why didn't they? Ah, now he remembered. Having to run from Will or explain to his father why he didn't want to spend time at the company had indeed taken up all his time and Bianca's as well, who ran from Hades as much or more than he himself did. But here? In the stillness without people chasing them was heaven, like a weight had finally lifted off their shoulders. It probably wouldn't last long, unfortunately. That’s why Nico wanted to take it slow, and maybe that way, he’d have more time to organize his mind and decide what to do from this moment on.

"All good?” Percy said in the hallway, as they left the room, heading towards the stairs to reach the first floor. “You've been quiet since we got in the bath.”

“Hm.” Was he that obvious or was Percy just paying attention? "I was thinking…”

"In what?”

“I… I just want to finish high school without the drama, you know? Graduate and try to make something useful out of life.”

"Is this about us?"

“I meant it when I said I didn't want a boyfriend. But I want my bestfriend back.”

"Allright.” Percy waved, all serious, though he had his hands on Nico's shoulders as they walked down the stairs, too close, to be honest. But it was a closeness Nico liked, even if he knew it made things more complicated. "Are you going to stop talking to me or is it about the sex?"

"I…" It was another good question. Did he want to get away from Percy?

“So there's no reason to put labels on what we are. It's just a name. I’ll never ask for something that you are not interested in providing.”

Nico knew all of this. Percy had never done something like that before and it wasn't now that his friend would start forcing him into something. In fact, Percy had been so patient that he'd been mistaking care for disinterest all these years. Now, he understood. Well, he understood because of yesterday. It was revealing. For real.

"Percy, look--”

“I understand more than anyone, but that doesn't change anything between us. I'm not in a hurry and I'm not going anywhere.”

"You promise?”

"I promise. I'm the same old Percy and you are my sweet little Nico. Nothing’s going to change.”

Nico blinked slowly and found himself lost in Percy's eyes, caught in every word and every whisper uttered. He knew all of this and hated how sexual the nickname now sounded, ‘my little Nico’ or ‘my sweet Nico’ spilling from Percy's lips in a tone so possessive and hot he should have run far away while he still could. He knew he should, and that was the problem, the urge and compulsion to get close to Percy was greater than any rationalization he could’ve had. When he realized what was happening, he found himself pressed against the wall at the bottom of the stairs, Percy right next to him, hands on his ass, their hips grinding against each other, and Percy's fingers pulling him by his hair in that kind of kiss meant for privacy of a bedroom walls.

He didn't remember Percy being this intense. Was all of this really because he'd been away for two years? The boy he knew was sweet, kind, and selfless. Now, most of the time, he could barely control himself when Percy decided that talking wasn't what they were supposed to do. Like in that moment, feeling Percy's hips grinding against his, almost making him come in his pants like a teenager, something he'd never was defore.

Gathering strength he didn't even know he had, Nico dragged his lips away from Percy's and took a deep breath and then pushed him away, just enough to disentangle their bodies, holding Percy by the shoulders at a safe distance.

"You can’t do that. You said you wouldn't force me.”

“I'm not forcing you.” Then Percy thought again and added, “I’m sorry. I won't do it again.”

Nico wasn't sure he believed it. Those green eyes on him, so intense they seemed to burn wherever they landed and the quick, gasping breaths told him something else, told him that if it was up to Percy they wouldn't be standing in the middle of the stairs.

"Percy, I don't think this is going to work."

“I said I'm sorry. I had to wait a long time. That's it. I'm not a monster, no matter what people say.”

“Nobody says anything.” Well, not since he went abroad. He remembered how Lou and Alabaster had hinted that Percy was waiting for the right moment to strike. And, all he had thought at the time was, “So what if Percy was? Were they jealous?” In the end, he'd walked away with a broken heart and another trauma for the collection.

“Hm, beautiful.” Percy smiled and this time Nico was paying attention. Percy took a step forward and contrary to what he expected, Percy didn't try to kiss him, I mean, not on the lips. Percy took his hands and brought them to his lips, kissing each finger separately. "I would never do anything that could hurt you. I hope you know that.”

"I do know.” Nico thought he knew, but he had discovered that good people could do bad things and after his last relationship, he wasn't sure of anything. “Just… let's take it slow, shall we?”

"Sure, Nico.”

Percy smiled once more and let both hands fall apart only to hold them in a comforting grip as they both looked down at their clasped hands. It was a scene he had never let himself visualize before, him and Percy, in a quiet place, nature around them, maybe some chairs stretched out in the sun and the two of them together, holding each other's hand as they watched the sun go down. Maybe… maybe if he was lucky enough. In a not too distant future. Maybe if they could--

“Here you are. How long will you whisper in the dark?

It was Bianca. Who else could it be?

***

For some reason, Percy wanted to laugh, even though the experience was turning out to be stranger than he'd anticipated. Instead of finding Hades who had told him he would arrive that morning, it was Bianca who had greeted them last night and opened the door for them; she hadn't asked anything and just said, 'Nico's room is in the same place.'

With a shrug, he had picked Nico up and headed upstairs, not the least bit put off by Bianca's presence. Percy admitted he was moving too fast, too eager, but who could blame him when as soon as they entered the room Nico had moaned softly and kissed him even sweeter, starting to take off his own clothes and lying in the middle of the bed with his legs open? He was only human, and like the weak being that he was, he did what Nico didn't have the courage to ask aloud, but said with his gaze and all that bare skin. Percy had knelt on the bed, kissed from Nico's legs to his neck to finally touch where he wanted most. Maybe he got a little carried away, touched too hard, because when he saw Nico, the boy was coming in his mouth and on his face, moaning as if it hurt and contracting so hard that for a moment he thought Nico was going to have an epileptic seizure; the only reason Percy wasn't worried was the expression of pure ecstasy on the delicate face of his baby, the heaving sigh as Nico relaxed on the bed and closed his eyes, calm and content.

He hadn't even cared about the result, him excited and frustrated, and Nico sleeping peacefully. It was his fault, plus Nico was under no obligation to reciprocate, whether they were dating or not. Taking a deep breath, all Percy did for long minutes was watch Nico sleeping comfortably on the bed, arms stretched over his head, gripping the pillows, legs spread and cock now flaccid, small and collected in the path of thin black hair that went from the lower part of his belly button to his groin, still wet with saliva and semen. Percy wanted to touch him again right then, turn Nico on one more time and see how long it took for him to come again.

In the end, making an effort to get away, Percy got out of bed slowly so as not to wake Nico up, entered the bathroom that was inside the suite and lowered his pants. It would be safer if he took care of things away from Nico, just to make sure he could behave the rest of the night; Percy knew how suspicious Nico was when it came to sexuality and trust, especially when a year ago Nico had broken up with his boyfriend and not told him the reason. And even if he suspected what had happened, that was none of his business either. If Nico didn't want to tell him, Percy should respect his decision. For now.

That way, He took care of things mechanically, found a clean towel, dampened it with warm water and cleaned Nico, then stripped off his clothes and climbed into bed with him. Percy had barely laid his head on the pillow when Nico wrapped his arms around his neck in his sleep, snuggling against him. Legs against legs and chest against chest, practically kissing him, stretched against his body.

"I missed you.” Nico murmured, sighing contentedly and falling back into his deep sleep once more.

Percy thought that had been one of the happiest moments of his life, Nico after so long letting himself be vulnerable around him when Percy thought that these scenes would never happen again.

Feeling a tightness in his heart as if it would explode at any moment and wanting to cry, Percy finally allowed himself to close his eyes and accept his feelings. He loved Nico, not even time or other people would make that same sense of completeness set in; no one made him feel as good and as powerful as Nico did, no one made him laugh or cry as easily, or create this crazy desire in him to be the best just to make sure he was able to give Nico everything he needed.

“I missed you too.” Percy ended up muttering back before falling asleep, pulling Nico closer and finally letting himself go.

Now they were sitting at the kitchen table, Bianca sitting across from him while Nico sat beside him, filling a plate with food and a cup of plain, unsweetened coffee, handing it to him.

“You still remember.” Percy said picked up the cup, taking a sip and inhaling the fragrance of freshly brewed and ground coffee, not as strong as he liked, but of exemplary quality. It was all so familiar that Percy found himself smiling, watching Bianca smirking and Nico pretend he wasn't embarrassed by the compliment. Nico was never very good at receiving them.

"I did nothing.”

“Hm.” He murmured, trying not to provoke Nico any further. But he couldn't help it, he followed Nico with his gaze, seeing him finally sit down and grab a glass of orange juice, taking a long sip before concentrating on his plate, when Bianca looked at him and asked:

"Percy Jackson, what brings you here?"

“Nico.” He said and smiled at Bianca. Between them there was never room for anything but outright sincerity. After all, she had allowed Nico to practically move into his home for those long, magnificent years and he wouldn’t do anything to break the trust between them.

"Are you serious this time?"

"Yes.”

"That’s nice.”

Bianca nodded, satisfied. She turned back to her food and raised a mouthful of eggs to her lips.

"What was this?” Nico asked, putting down his fork. He crossed his arms and glared at them.

"I wanted to know.” Bianca shrugged. “You arrived late yesterday.”

"I can’t believe this!” Nico covered his face and groaned anxiously. "Did you see us?"

"I saw everything.”

There was silence, however, not for long. Nico pushed back his chair and stood up, staggering.

“I need… I need to get my bag.”

Which was just one reason for him to hide for a while or until the blush faded away. Percy watched Nico drag himself out of the kitchen and turned to Bianca.

"So, then?" He asked. He knew Bianca wanted to say something, but he didn't want Nico to hear.

"You look different.”

"As?”

“More…decided. Mature.”

“Some things happened.”

When Bianca didn't say anything else, he shrugged and continued:

“Nico left and I found out a few things.”

"Things?”

"Nothing much.”

Bianca raised her eyebrows and Percy surrendered.

“It seems I was very nice and innocent. So I decided not to be anymore.”

"Do not tell me.”

"Nobody tells me these things! I thought Nico didn't think about…about…”

“Sex?”

“Apparently I was wrong and he thought I wasn't interested.”

"Hm..." Bianca looked at him for a few more moments and was merciful. “It's not your fault, it was that blonde girl who was always after you.”

"Damn it. I don't even like women!"

"And? I would be more careful if I were you.”

Percy knew this wasn't a threat but it was a warning, as Bianca would never do anything to get in the way of Nico's happiness.

"Do you think I should do something more drastic?"

“I think Nico would do something drastic if he thinks he's in the way.”

Percy stopped breathing for a moment and realized the seriousness of the problem, only now did he see that Bianca looked worried. She wouldn't be home when responsibility always came first for the Di Angelos; she wouldn't be wasting that precious time if Bianca didn't think it was extremely important.

“I'll take care of everything. You don’t need to worry.”

"It's what I hope.”

With that, they both lowered their heads and continued to eat until Nico returned, calmer and more composed. Both finished eating the rest of the food, and in a hurry, Nico soon pulled him by the hand and towards the car parked in front of the Di Ângelo's house.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

As always, your feedback is always important. Thanks for reading!

sorry for the vague-ish posts that aren’t inherently directed at anything nor are tethered to a single idea/fandom. I’ll probably post actual art later

Writing meme!

to all my fellow ace specs, you are valid and loved

to all my fellow aro specs, you are valid and loved.

happy ace week!!

favorite marvel scenes (1/?) guardians of the galaxy vol. 2 (2017)

What kind of a pair are we? The kind that's about to go fight a planet, I reckon.

NÃO HÁ LUGAR COMO O LAR - PERCY/NICO AU COLEGIAL - CAPÍTULO IV

Oii, como vai? Estou muito feliz com o que consegui escrever até aqui. Pensei que eu tinha desaprendido a escrever, sabe? Então é legal ver as coisas se desenvolvendo bem.

Nesse capítulo preciso dar alguns avisos. Pra quem me conhece sabe que sempre escrevo sobre sexo, seja no começo, meio, final ou durante a história inteira, mas como esse blog é novo achei bom avisar.

Outra coisa é que, como estou postando conforme escrevo algumas coisas podem mudar. Assim, se tiver algo novo e que mudou eu aviso nas notas finais ou aqui no começo. E tipo, quero dizer que eu não gosto de personagens muito... bonzinhos, então, a personalidade do Percy e do Nico vão começar a se mostrar, ok? Nada do tipo vilanesco, mas que pode gerar algum tipo de discussão, e sobre isso eu não aviso. De fato, raramente faço avisos, embora eu goste de conversar sobre a história. (Avisos são sobre coisas que eu não costumo abordar, assuntos taboo demais ou sobre algum tipo de non-con).

Dessa forma, vocês estão convidados a dar sua opinião sobre qualquer aspecto da história, seja em português, inglês ou espanhol. Sim, sou quase trilíngue ou seria poliglota? srsrsr De qualquer forma, espero que seja um boa leitura!

Capítulos anteriores: CAPÍTULO I / CAPÍTULO II / CAPÍTULO III

— Então me deixe decidir. Eu só preciso da sua permissão.

— Permissão para fazer o que?

Nico observou em câmera lenta a mão que estava em volta de seu ombro viajar para sua nuca, massageando o lugar, e o puxando suavemente para mais perto, inclinando sua cabeça até alcançar a posição certa para os lábios de Percy finalmente descerem contra os seus no beijo mais inocente e doce que ele já tinha provado, como se Percy estivesse determinado a recuperar tudo o que eles tinham perdido, começando por um beijo terno e casto, num leve roçar de lábios, jantares a luz de velas e… e muitos abraços?

O problema é que as coisas não ficariam castas por muito tempo. Gemendo e estremecendo, Nico sentiu uma das mãos de Percy descerem por suas costas numa carícia lenta e com vontade, entrando por dentro de sua camisa, o prensando contra seu peito bem no exato momento onde ele abriu a boca num arfar necessário para ter sua língua capturada e chupada, de forma tão gostosa que ele se viu fechando os olhos e gemendo novamente, se agarrando nos ombros de Percy com medo de sair voando.

— Tão bom assim, hm? — Percy murmurou algum momento depois, lábios ainda grudados aos dele, os mordiscando lentamente, mãos a salvo e longe de qualquer parte sensível. Por enquanto.

Isso era tão injusto! Tinha esperado tanto tempo por esse momento! E agora era difícil pensar, quanto mais devolver uma resposta aceitável. Ele tinha sentido falta dessa proximidade, e principalmente tinha sentido falta de beijar Percy, mesmo que tivesse o beijado apenas uma vez antes de ir para a Itália envergonhado e com o rabo entre as pernas.

— Bebê. — Percy sussurrou mais uma vez contra seus lábios e os lambeu, o pegando desprevenido mais uma vez, a língua dele se encontrando contra a sua, selando seus lábios juntos, as mãos de Percy se fincando em seus cabelos, os puxando um pouco, lhe fazendo gemer, enquanto a outra mão em sua cintura o arrastava pelo banco, o puxando para mais perto, quase o colocando em seu colo, isso é, quando um pigarro em algum lugar próximo a deles foi ouvido.

— Os senhores estão prontos para pedir?

O beijo foi quebrado com um barulho molhado e um choramingo necessitado que vinha dele mesmo. Nico voava, flutuando nas sensações que nem lembrava mais, e nem mesmo o garçom tentando chamar a atenção deles poderia impedi-lo. Então, suas costas foi colocada contra o assento do banco e as mãos de Percy voltaram a seus ombros, agora o massageando devagar como se isso pudesse acalmá-lo. Ele ouviu uma risada sem graça e então a voz de Percy soou no ambiente, rouca e lenta, pedindo um vinho e o prato do dia. Apenas um prato. De qualquer forma, não é como se eles fossem comer muito.

— Obrigado. — Percy disse depois de alguns minutos, Nico se sentindo contente em ficar quieto e ver o garçom se afastar todo encabulado.

— Garoto mal, constrangendo pobres serventes. O que eles vão dizer da gente?

— Quem é mal aqui? — Ele se viu dizendo, nenhum pouco arrependido, embora não tenha sido ele quem começou.

— Você tem razão, eu sou. Contanto que você seja bom pra mim.

Ele nem se deu ao trabalho de responder, apenas olhou para a expressão convencida no rosto de Percy, tão arrogante que ele teve o impulso de mostrar quem mandava ali. Então, como num passe de mágica, Percy sorriu e segurou em seu rosto perto de seu pescoço e encostou seus lábios contra os dele longamente num gesto afetuoso que esquentava sua pele da mesma forma que algo mais intenso faria. 

— Não fique bravo comigo.

— Você acha que pode resolver tudo com beijos?

— Nem tudo. Sexo e presentes também podem ajudar. Quem sabe uma massagem bem relaxante?

Nico sentia vontade de bater em Percy até que não pudesse mais. Felizmente a comida deles chegou e uma garrafa inteira com duas taças foi colocada na mesa.

— Você está tentando me deixar bêbado?

— É o seu preferido.

Realmente era o seu favorito, seco e tinto, forte. Uma boa safra também. Ele se perguntava se toda família italiana era assim, parecendo que tinha vinho nas veias no lugar de sangue. Isso não era importante, logo Percy abria a garrafa e enchia suas taças até o limite.

— A novos começos e velhos amigos.

Eles brindaram, dando algumas garfadas nos intervalos de beijos e risadas, e beberam mais um pouco até que a garrafa estava vazia, o céu lá fora há muito tempo escuro, perdido no breu da noite junto a qualquer inibição que eles poderiam ter.

***

E como ele tinha dito antes, sua vida era um grande clichê barato. Nico não se lembrava como tinha chegado em casa, quem tinha aberto a porta ou como eles tinham subido as escadas em direção a seu quarto. Eles tinham trancado a porta? Onde estava sua mochila? E seu violão? Eles tinham--

— Nico… bebê… — Ele jogou a cabeça para trás e gemeu, estava tão bêbado, suas pernas nos ombros de Percy e suas mãos agarrando qualquer coisa que ele pudesse se segurar. 

Não fazia muito tempo que Percy tinha lhe jogado na cama e arrancado seus sapatos e calças, cueca, jaqueta e camisa de uma vez só. Ele mal teve tempo de subir na cama até os travesseiros e Percy já estava lá, no meio de suas pernas, tocando, beijando, marcando com seus dentes onde quer que eles pousassem. Tudo estava indo tão rápido que quando menos percebeu, Percy lambia seu membro rapidamente, de cima até a base, para ir por suas bolas e então… então sua entrada, mordiscando e usando seus dedos e língua, ambos lutando contra a embriaguez e o caminho estreito, tão estreito… fazia muito tempo que ele tinha tentado alguma coisa, ainda que essa coisa não tenha tido sucesso.

— Nico, você tem que certeza que--

— Eu tenho! Eu tenho!

— Está tudo bem mesmo? Está tão apertado… hmm… — Mas Percy estava gemendo, como se fosse ele quem estivesse sendo tocado. — E cheira tão bem…

Nico estava tão feliz de ter se precavido!-- ele nem teve tempo de terminar o pensamento quando sentiu… sentiu os dedos de Percy sumirem de dentro dele, sendo substituídos pela língua de Percy, molhada e levemente áspera, roçando ao redor da área enrugada para se forçar para dentro, se movendo ritmicamente… ele não ia conseguir, fazia tanto tempo que ninguém tentava tocar ali, a sensação dessa vez foi bem melhor, tão gostoso que ele podia… sua coluna se curvou e ele gemeu, um som profundo vindo desde seu pulmão, escapando de seu lábios. E claro, a boca de Percy já estava lá, momentaneamente ajudando a prolongar seu orgasmo, os dedos de Percy voltando a penetrá-lo, agora deslizando com mais facilidade, o lubrificante enfim fazendo seu trabalho. Mas era tarde demais, os lábios de Percy sobre seu membro eram muito intensos, mais do que ele podia aguentar. Finalmente se sentiu gozando e gozando quando Percy o chupou com vontade, lambendo a cabecinha de seu membro, o fazendo doer tão gostoso que ele teve que puxar Percy pelos cabelos para empurrá-lo para longe seu membro, ainda pulsando com o sêmen que escapou dos lábios de Percy, escorrendo abaixo por seu pescoço.

— Tudo bem? — Percy perguntou, mas ele não sabia. Parecia que tinham arrancado sua calma através do orgasmo. Nico mal conseguia abrir os olhos ou respirar, ainda se sentindo pulsar e estremecer. — Eu te machuquei?

Nico conseguiu apenas negar com a cabeça, tentando controlar seu corpo. Tinha sido tão repentino que seus nervos ainda tentavam acompanhar os acontecimentos e ele… Nico não lembrava de alguém já ter feito isso por ele, tão… tão… minuciosamente.

— Nico.

Ele estava tentando, jurava que estava. Ele só estava tendo dificuldade em fazer sua cabeça parar de girar.

— Nico, olhe para mim. — Então, ele fez, porque parecia algo simples o suficiente.

— Aqui está você. Meu Nico mentiu para mim?

— Eu… menti? — Nico não entendeu a pergunta, por que ele mentiria? Ele piscou lentamente e viu que Percy não parecia bravo, ele se deitava entre suas pernas ainda completamente vestido. Percy segurava em seus cabelos e os acariciava com um sorriso bonito no rosto.

— Quando foi a última vez?

— Não sei. Nunca? Nunca cheguei a… você sabe. — Ele se viu suspirando, seus olhos ficando pesados por causa dos dedos de Percy em seu couro cabeludo o ninando devagar.

— Isso explica muita coisa.

— Hm?

— Por que você não descansa um pouco?

— Onde você vai? — Mas já era tarde demais, com outro suspiro seus olhos se fecharam mais uma vez, o fazendo dormir mais rápido do que nenhuma pílula jamais conseguiu.

***

Quando Nico abriu os olhos novamente ainda estava escuro e o relógio na parede marcava duas da manhã. Eles ainda estavam em sua cama e como sempre, Percy tinha cumprido sua promessa; eles dormiam de lado, o lençol os cobria, Percy atrás dele o abraçando pela cintura, com sua outra mão debaixo… debaixo de sua cabeça, se curvando ao redor de seu pescoço, peito contra costas, rosto contra nuca e talvez ele estivesse segurando nesse braço ao redor de seu pescoço como se estivesse abraçando um ursinho de pelúcia contra o peito. Estranhamente, ele não se sentia sufocado, igual aconteceria se fosse com qualquer outra pessoa, era como… como um lembrete físico de que eles estavam ali juntos e que dessa vez Percy não o deixaria fugir.

O que ele estava fazendo? Há poucas horas estava dizendo que não estava preparado e que não queria um relacionamento e agora… o quê? Estava confortável em permanecer naquela posição, preso naquele agarre mais do que possessivo e ainda… ainda gostando disso? Aprovando a atitude de Percy? Ele tinha jurado que nunca deixaria ninguém se aproximar tanto assim de novo, dessa forma afetiva, mas esse era Percy, não? Sabia que podia confiar nele. Certo? E além de tudo, era apenas sexo. Que mal tinha nisso? Mesmo que ele estivesse falando de Percy, a pessoa que mais o conhecia nesse mundo…

Quer dizer, ele tinha voltado porque sentia falta de Percy, mas não esperava ser correspondido e muito menos tão rápido, até porque eles tiveram tanto tempo juntos e nada havia acontecido no passado, então, por que aconteceria assim? Do nada? Ele sabia que Percy tentava ser a melhor versão de si mesmo, porém, conhecendo Percy como ele o conhecia?... Bem, Percy não era o tipo de pessoa que perdoava fácil; característica que ambos compartilhavam. Então, ninguém poderia culpá-lo se ele estivesse esperando passar um tempo com o amigo para enfim se conformar que as coisas entre eles não iriam funcionar. Agora, ele se pegava nesse beco sem saída, de fato, sendo correspondido. A verdade é que Nico não tinha se preparado para nada disso, não tinha planejado ou pensado no que Percy o corresponder realmente significava para seu futuro. Ele provavelmente teria voltado para a Itália depois de se formar em alguns anos, ficando o suficiente para resolver o que precisasse e depois… depois ele iria fazer o que o pai vinha pedindo há anos.

O que ele devia fazer agora? Isso não podia ser uma boa ideia, tinha certeza que algo iria acontecer e destruir tudo, porque era o que acontecia com ele, e quem teria que lidar com as consequências era ele. Então, por que se deixou levar? Foi por causa do vinho? Qual desculpa ele usaria agora que não estava mais bêbado? Por que continuava na mesma posição, tão contente como nunca esteve, se deixando ser abraçado daquela forma e sentindo Percy praticamente o prensar contra a cama em seu sono? E se ele--

— Nico? — Percy disse rouco, sua voz sonolenta chamando sua atenção.

— Eu te acordei?

— Seu coração. Está disparado.

Para provar seu ponto, Percy levou a mão para o meio do peito de Nico e massageou o local, subindo e descendo as mãos, piorando as coisas com isso. Ele queria chorar e queria se debater, queria fugir de volta para a Itália e se esconder onde ninguém nunca mais o encontraria. No fim tudo o que fez foi ficar quieto, quase sem respirar, sentindo Percy se mover contra ele, enfiar uma das pernas entre as dele, o fazendo arfar quando Percy roçou os lábios contra sua nuca, virando sua cabeça devagar em direção a ele até que Percy juntou seus lábios devagar, num gesto afetuoso.

— O que aconteceu, hm? Qual o problema? — Percy disse, parecendo mais estar dormindo do que acordado, se roçando contra ele, devagar e calmo, no controle.

Nico não sabia o que estava acontecendo exatamente, apenas sabia que estava funcionando. Sentindo pele na pele e tão seguro, deixou o ar sair e abriu a boca, encontrando Percy bem ali pronto para recebê-lo docemente, voltando a abraçá-lo com força, deslizando suas línguas juntas, fácil e gostoso, como se eles sempre tivessem feito isso, tão descomplicado feito respirar.

— Você não vai me dizer? — Percy se afastou por um momento e piscou lentamente para ele, um pouco mais acordado.

Nico apenas olhou para Percy, cabelos bagunçados e lábios inchados, olhos quase se fechando de cansaço. Foi quando a realidade o acertou em cheio feito um soco no estômago. Ele o amava, realmente o amava. Nico não gostava de Percy porque ninguém mais quis ser seu amigo em seu pior momento ou porque Percy o defendeu durante a infância, nem mesmo era porque Percy sempre foi seu melhor amigo e sempre seria. Agora, observando aqueles olhos verdes, enfim se dava conta da verdade. Como ele não poderia amar alguém tão gentil e preocupado, alguém tão bondoso? Tão prestativo, sempre disposto a resolver seus problemas sem ele nem ter que pedir ajuda?

— Eu te amo. — Nico disse sem pensar, distraído pela forma que Percy se inclinou em direção a ele mais uma vez, prestes a lhe dar mais um beijo. Isso fez Percy parar no meio do caminho, franzir o nariz numa expressão confusa e depois sorrir, se aproximando o resto da distância, encostando seus lábios num leve roçar.

— Eu te amo mais. Muito. Muito mais.

Era estranho, ele não se sentia mais diferente do que há cinco minutos, mas fazia bem para seu coração, permitindo que ele tirasse um peso das costas que Nico nem sabia estar lá. Percy dizendo que o amava também não o fazia sentir melhor ou pior, era um fato bem óbvio, principalmente depois de ver tudo o que aconteceu nesses últimos anos. O único efeito aparente era aquecer seu coração, como as ligações faziam, como olhar para o rosto de Percy e ver o sorriso caloroso ali, sempre disponível para ele ou como os braços de Percy sempre estavam abertos para lhe receber.

— Não precisa se preocupar com isso. — Percy disse, voltando a acariciar o meio de seu peito, o virando de frente e o abraçando de novo, sem um centímetro de distância entre eles, as mãos de Percy deslizando por suas costas, uma delas se fincando nos cabelos de sua nuca, o lugar preferido de Percy o tocar, agora, e no passado quando ele não sabia o que esse gesto significava. Ou escolhia ignorar o fato.

— Me preocupar com o quê?

— Eu consigo ver no seu rosto.

— Eu não fiz nada.

— Mas quer fazer. Então, antes de você criar essas histórias e agir impulsivamente, fale comigo. 

— Per.

— Você prometeu que não ia fugir.

— Quando foi isso?

— Quando você disse que tinha voltado pra ficar.

Nico não prometeu nada, mas era como se tivesse. 

No fim, Percy tinha razão. Ele devia se preocupar menos. O que adiantava antecipar o que poderia acontecer se o futuro tinha tantas possibilidades? Ou esses pensamentos positivos e felizes podiam ser a influência de Percy sobre ele. Nico suspeitava que assim que Percy parasse de tocá-lo, essas preocupações voltariam feito uma bigorna jogada em sua cabeça. Porém, naquele momento, ele se deixaria ser consolado e abraçado, deixaria que o sorriso de Percy iluminasse a escuridão ao redor dele e deixaria que mais um beijo o fizesse suspirar e esquecer que amanhã era um novo dia e que com ele, mais problemas apareceriam para lhe preocupar.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Obrigada por ler e por todo o apoio^^