Not sure how this works. I'll figure things out as I go. But for now, I hope what I have isn't difficult to navigate.
426 posts
Latest Posts by all-the-thoughts-ever-thought - Page 9
Growing up my parents taught me that if you’re too sick to [insert responsibility here] then you’re too sick to [insert something that makes you happy here].
It took me a really long time to unlearn this. When I would get sick or have a “bad day” I would deprive myself of anything that made me happy. Watching movies, eating something I enjoyed, going for a walk, playing video games or just browsing online looking at funny cat videos. I wouldn’t let myself do these things because I was always told that if I’m too sick to go to work, or do homework, or go to school then I must be too sick to play Mortal Kombat or watch Unsolved Mysteries lol.
Whenever I wouldn’t feel good, which I later learned as an adult was due to sleep deprivation caused by my ADHD and depression (and of course the depression itself would cause me to feel like shit), my parents would tell me “if you’re not throwing up, then you’re not sick.” And when I would stay home from school (or even work in my later teen years) my parents would make sure that I didn’t have any “fun.” No TV, no movies, no games, no going outside, no arts and crafts, no books, no nothing. Just lay in bed and feel miserable.
I’m happy to say that I no longer do this to myself. Now when I’m having a bad day or I’m sick (cold, flu or whatever) I allow myself to do the things (within reason lol) that I actually love doing. If I’m not too sick to step outside for a few minutes then I’ll go for a walk. I’ll watch my favorite movies and if it’s a bad day or a cold (something that doesn’t hinder my appetite too much) I’ll eat my favorite foods. I don’t guilt trip myself anymore for having a “sick day.”
Just because you’re sick (whether physically, emotionally or mentally) doesn’t mean that you can’t do things you enjoy. You’re not any less sick because you watch TV. You’re not any less sick because you’re playing video games.
Actually you SHOULD be doing these things when you’re not feeling good because they make you feel better. The better you feel, the faster your heal.
What’s going to make you happy right now? Is it some cake? Is it a nap? Is it calling your mom? Is it going on a drive and blasting music? Is it taking a bath? Is it reading a book?
Check in with yourself because you deserve that happiness, whatever it is.
this feels like a good reference (and if possible, from personal experience, i’d recommend packing ahead of time if you can…your panicked brain is not as effective as you think it is)
“Particularly prone to serious procrastination problems are children who grew up with unusually high expectations placed on them…or else they exhibited exceptional talents early on, and thereafter “average” performances were met with concern and suspicion from parents and teachers.”
Holy SHIT
Alright, I need to have a chat with the teenagers that follow me, specifically regarding lying about your age and nsfw content. This isn’t directed at anyone, but I think it’s a convo that needs to be had in general.
I was a teenager once. I get it. Everyone lies about their age online. Maybe not to other people, but I’m sure every minor has clicked a ‘yeah, sure, I’m 18+” button at some point in their lives. I’m not here to shame you for that.
What I am here to say is it is vital that teenagers understand the difference between engaging in sexual content independently (ie, entering a fake birthday to access 18+ content), and lying about your age to engage in sexual activities with others online (joining discord servers/using nsfw channels intended for adults only/lying about your age to talk to nsfw content creators/commissioning nsfw art/etc).
Lying about your age to a website so you can look at porn is one thing. It’s an entirely independent experience, where the only consent that really matters is yours. Nobody has any power over you in this situation, and there’s about no chance of legal consequences.
However, lying about your age to other human beings is extremely different. If you’re engaging in nsfw roleplay with a friend about the same age as you, talking about sex with other teenagers, sharing nsfw fics among friends, that’s one thing. But do not lie about your age to engage in sexual activities/discussions. Not only is something that could have actual legal ramifications, and very serious ones depending on what’ going on, but it’s a violation of the other people’s consent. The moment other real people are involved, you need to be respectful of their boundaries & what is and isn’t appropriate for you to be engaging with. If they say no minors, I don’t care if you’re 17.5, you stay out until you are 18 years old.
Examples of situations where it is never okay to lie or mislead anyone about your age online include:
Joining/accessing nsfw channels or servers on discord.
Yes, I know it’s very easy to just click that little red button on discord that lets you access the channel you’re so curious about. It looks just like the one you see on adult websites that you click without thinking.
Don’t do it.
If channels are 18+ then you stay out of them. There are other real life human beings involved who did not give consent to have a minor in an adult orientated space.
Engaging with nsfw creators/content directly
ie, commissioning nsfw artwork, following or talking to nsfw creators who’ve asked for no interactions from minors/flagged their accounts as 18+ only, subscribing to nsfw creators on patron, nsfw roleplay, etc.
Joining/engaging with adult only communities, like Fetlife or cam sites.
Engaging in romantic and/or sexual online relationships
Any time you are talking with one or more other real human beings, particularly any adults, in a sexual context.
I know that adult websites have basically trained teenagers to just say they’re 18 and move on, but it is vital that teenagers understand that it is never okay to lie about your age when directly engaging in any kind of sexual activity. Knowing people’s age is a vital part of consent, and if an adult is found to have been engaging in sexual activity with a minor, they could face life long legal consequences. Not only that, but a basic facet of consent is clear, honest communication. If you are lying to a partner, then you do not have consent. Lying about your age is a huge violation of consent.
That’s not to say you can never mention sex around adults online. There are times and places where you may be asking for advice, or even just making jokes about sex or whatever. That’s all well and good, so long as everyone is on the same page. It’s on adults to make sure that we are behaving appropriately around minors online, and make sure that we’re setting boundaries in those relationships. But it’s on minors to communicate that they are minors, and respect those boundaries that are set.
So, tl;dr,
Lying about your age to access a porn site is fine. Lying about your age to engage in sexual situations/adult-only spaces where other real human beings are involved is not.
There’s something inherently hilarious about taking one of those indie puzzle-platformers that’s intended to be a contemplative exploration of personal identity or mental illness or what have you and speed-running it.
some of my favorite woven tapestries, by Cecilia Blomberg:
Point Defiance Steps
Mates
Rising Tides
Vashon Steps
The weirdest guy I ever met in a church was this boy who referred to “Buzz Aldrin and his husband” going to the moon. I was completely baffled, and when I asked if he’d misspoken, he got really angry and accused me of being deliberately ignorant of the facts. It turned out that he was somehow comvinced that Buzz Aldrin and Neil Armstrong were married. It took five Wikipedia articles to convince him otherwise.
People easily mistake neurodivergent speech patterns and communication styles for run-of-the-mill pretentiousness.
Y’all talk weird on here. Sometimes I see a post and i agree but y’all talk weird so I’m like fuckYou.
jokes aside i think it’s amazing and heartwarming to see like 4chan incel bros perform the miracle of crawling out of that hole and becoming real human beings and chronicling their journey to realizing that they can be well adjusted happy normal dudes
Boys who are sex-repulsed/don’t enjoy sex/are too uncomfortable to have sex - you’re doing an amazing job at coping in a society that associates your maleness with having strong sexual desires. You are valid, you are loveable, you are not ‘weird’ for not fitting into the stereotype of men wanting sex all time.
I think people, women and girls especially, need to know that if you have a good thing going with another female friend, roomate, a cousin, a siblings, etc–then you don’t have to feel like marriage is like and endgame or something (if that makes sense). Ya know, lemme just make this girl centric.
Let me clarify. I see a lot of girls having happy relationships with their sisters, cousins,best friends, roommates to the point where they’ve been living together for years and are comfortable with it. And becuase of that comfort with the girls they’re living with, a lot of women just end up wanting to live/stay with their roommates, best friends, sisters/cousins, etc., for the foreseeable future.
And when a lot of girls bring this up, they’re met with “well one of you is gonna get married” or “no boy friend in the picture” or “well you can’t stay together forever/you can’t plan your lives around each other” or “what about if one of you gets a husband”
and like–seriously, just stop. when girls mention wanting to spend their lives with their boyfriends and shit, people don’t give them this much flack. girls are expected to pack up their lives to move with their boy friends/husbands.
but god forbid, two girls are just happy with each other, are in a place of comfort with the other that they wanna live together and spend their lives together (either romantic, familial or platonic), then people start to criticize them. So my point is, girls if you’re living with another girl and have been for years and you two are comfortable staying with each other and have basically spoken about just wanting to stay with each other, then do that. if this person makes you comfortable, makes you feel safe and happy, and supports you (whether romantic or not!) then do not let people ruin that bond or shame you for not getting married or being with a man or anything like that. like if you have something good going, then keep the good going.
and this doesn’t have to be romantic (if it is that’s fine too!!).
Barnes and Nobles is gonna start serving food and alcohol.
Everybody’s cracking jokes about how it’s a desperate attempt to stay relevant in the age of Amazon.
But you know what? Props to them. This is exactly what Blockbuster didn’t do. At no point was Blockbuster like “Hey, movie rentals aren’t the lucrative enterprise they once were. Perhaps it’s time we become known for our cheesy garlic bread.”
No one’s saying this so I guess I’ve gotta: no more shirtless scenes for men if the actors gotta starve himself. Its just as bad as woman being forced to lose weight for a needless sex scene/photoshoot what have you. If it endangers the health of the individual it should not be encouraged.