Drakken Vs. Gen Z

Y’all just ever wake up in the morning and realize that we’re all just piles of oozing flesh walking around on calcium stilts? Or that WE’RE the skeletons costumes, not the other way around?

Head Empty, Only Bumpy.

I’m late to the party because I’ve been meaning to write this post but also I am very lazy. 

ANYWAY. As you may know, I make it my life to lurk on the Camp Cretaceous tag on tumblr for the tea. When the trailer dropped, I saw many posts panicking about Bumpy and I would like to discuss that today.

First, calm down everyone. I’m sure she’s fine and hanging out on the island with other dinos right now. My reasoning being the fact that the raft scene we see in the trailer is most likely either episode one or two but most likely episode one. We can infer this from a couple things. First, the weather. It’s fair and moderate, meaning this happens either before or after the events of the tropical storm mentioned in the synopsis. What makes me think it’s before the tropical storm is the raft. If trapped on an island, wouldn’t your first escape idea be a raft? It’s basic. Still, it’s possible I’m wrong because if we look at the fun little chalkboard Brooklyn’s drawing on, we see them looking at getaway vehicles on the island, all of which are crossed out either on fire or something. But it’s hard to tell. So, maybe a raft might not be their first idea, but I’m going to run with it for now. So, make fun of me later, okay?

Now, theorizing that this is most likely the first episode of the season, it would explain as to why Bumpy doesn’t appear to be there. She’s too big and too heavy for any raft they build to support her. Not to mention the amount supplies they’d need just to care for her. Plus, they know she can’t come to the mainland with them and that she has to stay on the island. So, the chances are that before leaving, the fam said their goodbyes to Bumpy and got on the raft. Not to mention, they also likely looked for an ankylosaurus herd to put her into so they can be sure she’d be taken care of after they left since they didn’t expect for their plan to fail. This would explain why Bumpy isn’t around for the season. Still, I don’t think it’s the last we’ll see of our favorite emotional support dinosaur. She’ll return when we need her most. But that’s all just a theory... A DINOSAUR THEORY! i know I’m not funny sorry, I’ll just go now-

E750 Survival Skills (Potentially?)

Soooo, season three is a thing that’s happening now. Yay! Anyway, if any of you remember my absolute CRIME of a post about E750, then my deepest condolences because I’m BACK WITH MORE.

So, as you’re all aware, I’m a fool who has decided sleep is completely irrelevant to living my best life. I need only Netflix and some crazy theories. Speaking of crazy theories, let’s get into it.

So, if you had the great misfortune of reading my last CC theory and you remember it, you’ll know I talked about the potential of E750 being a new breed of Indominous, something very different, or even a fucked up horse. However, that’s not something to worry about at the moment. These were all just theories from before. But NOW, I wanna give y’all something new because I’m bored and I should actually post on my Tumblr blog. Now, one of the things we got from this trailer was a different perspective on the E750 containment unit. As in, we see it from a different POV. In season 2, the perspectives we got made it look pretty large, which in turn, gives the idea that this creature itself is large.

However, when we see Sammy and Brooklyn discover the tube in the trailer, the actual containment portion might be as tall as them, give or take. Meaning, it’s potentially around 5′7-5′3 if I’m judging it right which I might not be because... I’m kinda dumb. Still, that means that our dino friend here is not as large as we originally thought, possibly standing shorter than some of our main cast. I’m not saying it won’t get bigger. It could. However, what I am saying is that this dinosaur isn’t what we thought it was going to be.

As far as we know, this dinosaur is small and most likely not as strong as some of the other predators we’ve experienced in this series. Which begs the question, what makes it special. Obviously,  it was being made and also being held in cryogenic stasis, which means, it was created for a purpose. For a REASON. Every other dinosaur we’ve seen is either big and scary, strong as hell, or strongest in numbers. E750 doesn’t have any of that as it’s small, alone, and slender. How will it survive and threaten our main trio?

Well, I have a few ideas, some of which were also supplied by my partner-in-crime @baguette-whet . Obviously, this creature is predatory and based on it’s current size, quite slim. Meaning it can track these kids places other predators can’t, making it a danger to them even when they think they’re safe. Which limits their options from run and hide to just run.

Now, the other idea was the very first one I had. We know that to complete the I-Rex’s DNA, Wu had to use the genes of other animals. So, why not E750 as well? It’s very much possible that this creature has been genetically engineered with dangerous animal DNA or dangerous animal DNA was used to fill the gaps. The specific thought I had, that could really push this over the top? Venom. If it had venom that would make this creature much more dangerous than we originally thought, especially if the venom comes from a creature like a Komodo Dragon or some form of cobra. (Just had this thought RIGHT now but like, E750 SPITTING VENOM? CORROSIVE VENOM? Iconic.) 

These are just ideas I have and I don’t know if anyone else has wondered about this question as well but I would love other ideas. How do YOU think E750 is going to be a threat here in season 3?

Poptart Thief

So, Nico Di Angelo’s fatal flaw is holding grudges and he WILL hold them till the end of time. So, like, imagine Will doing something so minor, but Nico won’t shut up about it because he’s bitter and petty.

Like, Will eats Nico’s Poptart and now this is their conversation:

Will: Hey, Nico?

Nico, reading a book: Yeah?

Will: Have you seen my shoes?

Nico, not looking up: I don’t know, have you seen my motherfucking Poptart?

Will: Are you actually-

Well.

I'm unsure if I should be happy that I earned a treat or focus on being emotionally distraught after what I just read.

Literally my first post in the CB tag, so: hello, hi, nice to formally meet you all. I don't post but trust me I DO lurk in this tag. Doing this post so I can share my deteriorating thoughts but also so that in five weeks when I've forgotten everything I can see if I was right or not and whether I've earned a treat. Fair warning: I only know how to write essays. Big long theses. My bad. Whoops. All of this is PURE THEORIZING. I have no idea what truly happens, all information I gather is from the free episode(s) or what's posted here. I am simply taking shots in the dark for fun. Please don't yell at me. only saying this cause I normally post in communities where everyone has the same information but you all seem very nice so I'm not really worried about it :]

OKAY! SO! As a very normal human being with very normal interest in this silly comic, I scroll through the tag and see what you goobers post (because you're all very funny, talented, and entertaining) and I noticed that this week's fast pass episode has people in emotions. Very MUCH in emotions. I also noticed someone mention parallels to this week's free episode- which I spent way too long agonizing over but that's IRRELEVANT -and so my brain got to thinking. I could just satisfy my curiosity by using money but the way my anxiety will just beat me up for that is crazy. So, instead of that, I've decided that it's time to rabidly theorize about what happens for giggles. Basing my thoughts on the idea of this week's episodes having parallels, I have a few different thoughts.

All of my ideas are parallels of things that happened in the dungeon in the free episode since that has the most content to parallel and was the most prevalent part of the episode. With that in mind, here we go and apologies in advance.

Idea Number One: My first idea is that maybe there's a parallel to the scene where Buddy saves Chase from the creepy guard. Perhaps there's a similar situation to what happened in the free episode or- an idea I'm more partial to -within this book there's a person, place, or scene that reminds Buddy of Ex-Libris which causes him to have some sort of panic attack or a clearly afraid reaction. He's placed in a situation where he's reminded of something from EL that he is afraid of or has bad memories of. Something that Chase has to pull him away or calm him down from, but something that Chase has to save him from. Like how Buddy saved him this week.

Idea Number Two: This idea is based on the statement about ulterior motives and hiding things that Buddy made to Chase- who we all know is hiding something. In this idea, maybe Buddy finally finds out about Prunella and isn't pleased with Chase's lying to him and hiding things. They aren't besties but there's a thin line of trust between them that Chase potentially breaks by hiding Prunella. A person Buddy thought was honest and open suddenly hid something from him, so who's to say he's not hiding more? So, the actual IDEA is that maybe Buddy parallels the statement he makes, but this time in a more hurt tone or accusatory. Instead of apologizing and admitting "you can't have ulterior motives and you're pretty honest", he goes the opposite direction of "I was wrong, you're a liar and blah blah blah" (sorry didn't wanna write more lmao). Still, for a parallel, the statements would likely have to be similar in structure and in nature, and a line that has been living RENT-FREE in my head since this morning is: "I was too dumb to think you didn't have ulterior motives. Too dumb to see that you were hiding something." Or something to that effect. Paralleling that previous statement.

Idea Number Three: This idea I'm less sold on but screw it, throwing it in for giggles because I can and that's one more idea I have lying around. This one is based more on the situation between Chase and Buddy (Buddy being like "wow! thanks for not hiding things" to Chase "definitely hiding a whole ass child" Hollow). A simple switch of roles is what my third thought is. Chase takes Buddy's role of "Wow, so honest" and Buddy takes Chase's role of "Hiding things". The reason I don't like this one as much and I'm not as convinced is because for it to have as much emotion as the Fast Pass episode clearly had, there has to be some sort of emotional investment to whatever the thing was. And for there to be emotional investment, we would likely have to know what exactly Buddy would be hiding from Chase in this potential scenario. As of right now, we have nothing of the sort since getting that kind of information would require a Buddy POV episode which I don't think we're getting any time super soon? So, unless we suddenly find out things in the next four weeks, I doubt it's going to be something like this.

OKAY, I'M DONE NOW I SWEAR! I am so sorry for how long and unnecessary this post was (whoops) but I need to scream somewhere! I'll revisit this in five weeks I suppose to see if I'm right or not and if I've earned my little treat (reward yourselves for things man. self-love). I'll still be lurking, as always, but I guess I'll see y'all formally once again in like five weeks. Have a lovely day! :]

Imagine you are Atsushi. You think you know a man. You think you see him for who he is- bleeding claws and all. You think that you are sure in his character and in his entirety. You think that after so many battles and so much death, there is nothing else for you to know.

You are wrong.

You think the two of you could not be more different or distant if you tried. You think that despite any change you may have brought, he is still someone you could never understand. You've come to terms with the idea that you both are simply two sides of the same coin.

You are wrong.

And it takes an unfeeling blade for you to finally learn how much so.

You learn that you only vaguely knew him- a shadow blurred across your vision. You learn his claws are not simply bloodied from pain caused but from pain given- from climbing a mountain insurmountable even to one as strong as him. You learn that you knew his surface but not his core- something no battle had ever taught you. There is so much you have yet to know.

So, you follow.

You learn the two of you are not so very different, the distance no more than a few steps. You learn that any change you brought in him was because, unknowingly, you were speaking a language that you didn't know he spoke right back. You learn that the hate that he held for you was born of a desire just as your own.

So, you follow.

And you learn that there was never a coin at all, just a mirror- a thing made of broken edges, bruised bones, and hateful words. And you learn there were never two sides, simply two caged and cornered animals staring back at the other- hearts bleeding and hands grasping.

Grasping for acknowledgment, for acceptance, for a reason, for permission, for someone to tell them they were finally enough.

You stare at the man in the mirror, a dark anger of a person- all sharp points and serrated defenses- and can see yourself in his eyes. Eyes that don't look at you the same way they used to.

You wonder: when he looks in this mirror, does he see the same?

You will simply have to ask him once you return.

Imagine you are Atsushi. You have seen the heart of a man. A man with whom you cannot accurately describe your relationship- no word seems precise enough nor powerful enough. You still don't fully understand him. He still confuses you, annoys you, and causes an itch you cannot seem to scratch.

But none of that matters because you have already decided he is worth sacrificing for. Because he is Ryuunosuke Akutagawa.

You have already made it to the door that- if done right -will guide you back to him, aided by the ghosts of his past and yours.

And so, you place your hands upon the entrance and push.

Imagine you are Akutagawa. You wake up a blank slate- knowing simply your name and your purpose: protect the princess. Protect the commoners. Those are your only thoughts. Your only duty.

And so you do.

You must slay the evil that threatens the princess. Slaughter it so that it never darkens her doorstep again. Destroy it so that no commoner must fear again. But what you find is not simply the evil, but someone else. He seems to recognize you, but you cannot. He calls to you, afraid- you don't listen. Who is he?

No matter. He is a commoner, which means he must be protected. That is all there is to it. All that matters is destroying the evil in front of you. Nothing more. Nothing less. That is your duty as a knight.

You clash with the evil, a blur of blades and power and sparks. You fight to protect and to serve and to succeed.

And then you fall. You don't quite know how, but you fall nonetheless. You are prone and bleeding and hurt. You are lifted into the air, pain and anger and the voices: Protect the Princess. Protect the commoners. Protect the Princess. Protect the commoners. But you cannot move. You cannot fight. You accept your fate as a knight should. That is all you can do.

A weight crashes into you, heavy and deliberate. You feel yourself fall again, but this time it's different. Because you see him. Arms outstretched. Arm. Arm outstretched. He saved you- protected you. He let himself hurt for you. Die for you. Why? Why would he do this? Who is he? What is he? Why?

Why?

Why?

"Consider us even. Away with you..." he smiles at you, turning to light. "...you fool."

And you remember.

And you remember.

And you scream because that is your partner, your other half, your fool. The man you found enough to hurt for. To die for. To protect because he is Atsushi Nakajima and that was reason enough.

And you remember.

And you scream.

I forgot I made this, now I'm cackling at 3 AM. Send help.

Poptart Thief

So, Nico Di Angelo’s fatal flaw is holding grudges and he WILL hold them till the end of time. So, like, imagine Will doing something so minor, but Nico won’t shut up about it because he’s bitter and petty.

Like, Will eats Nico’s Poptart and now this is their conversation:

Will: Hey, Nico?

Nico, reading a book: Yeah?

Will: Have you seen my shoes?

Nico, not looking up: I don’t know, have you seen my motherfucking Poptart?

Will: Are you actually-

Disappoinment and Salt

Will, throwing open the curtains: Rise and shine! Time to give the gods your glory! 

Nico, huddled in his blankets in a corner: *Muffled* The gods can bite me if they think they're getting anything other than disappointment and salt from this bitch. 

Will: 

Will: Okay, then.

So, for my birthday weekend, my best friend came up and we watched the hit movie Akira for the first time (something we'd been planning for a while) and holy shit oh my god.

The way I have to sit at work like I didn't just watch Akira and like I'm not making notes for two separate analysis essays I'm hoping a professor assigns someday is not funny.